I am a 47 year caregiver for an 84 year old gentleman. His wife is in a nursing home do to a stroke a couple years back (before I entered the picture).
I was only suppose to be helping out with meals, doctor appts, and taking him to visit his wife a couple times a week, until his daughter could take over, but his daughter has her own health issues and is unable to take on her father's care. He has 5 children and the oldest son is the only one that seems to act like he cares, but I have noticed that there is a lot of hostility and anger towards their dad. They don't seem to understand what he did in his younger years in is the past and they re-live things he has said and done in his past.
Now, that I am taking care of him, the son does pay for his care, but not enough. (6-12) hrs a day 7 days a week, for $300, and now he is requesting daily updates on his fathers condition, what he eats, what we do daily, how much time we spend together and why I spend that much time with him.
Yes, the son does have POA, but his dad refuses to go into assisted living because he owns his home and wants to live there. I know his medical condition is not that bad he has,---a GI Bleed, high blood pressure, and Glaucoma, and the early stages of Dementia, and as long as someone is there to keep an eye on him he is fine. The son doesn't even live in the same state as his dad, but yet he wants to question the care I am providing.
Other people in the same town know him very well and tell him daily that he is being well taking care of and that he looks good, even the home health nurse has said that I am doing a good job. The son has repeatedly asked several people about me and what he pays me and has been told he won't find anyone cheaper. His dad wants me and only me, no one else to take care of him, so now I am in the middle, because the son is requesting more time of mine without wanting to pay me more. And making me feel as if I am not doing that good of a job after all.
Plus that, I do not want in the middle of their family feud but I do care for this man as if he is my grandfather and I do not want to see his kids treat him badly for things he did in his past. Or worse force him to move into assisted living, which I believe would kill him of sadness. He lives for his house on the bay and that's is all he wants.