My mom has vascular dementia and has not driven in 2 years. (She also had a below the knee amputation two years ago.) Lately, she gets into a loop of asking for keys and telling me I’m crazy and that she can drive and “just drove the other day”. She tells me I’m stupid and I want to take everything from her. We took her keys over two years ago but of course, she “remembers “ differently. Help! Every call/conversation ends in an argument.

I had this problem with my Father In Law. Went to a school parking lot on weekend. I set up a course. I said if you can complete this without hitting anything Ill give you the keys. About 5 minutes in he realized his driving time was past. I sold his car about two weeks later.

You need to be sure they will not pass this. I got tired of fighting with him.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to lacyisland

If you would remove the car she would most likely forget about it. It’s a constant reminder. Tell her it needed servicing if that seems plausible. Remove it when she is away or asleep or otherwise occupied.
Two years is a long time to be upset. Leaving it in view doesn’t seem to be working.
As always, if the behavior has gotten worse recently, have her tested for a UTI. That’s often the problem.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to 97yroldmom

Therapeutic fix time. Tell her the keys were lost and you haven’t been able to find them yet. If the car is still present, you may be able to sell it if you have a POA for her.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to worriedinCali
saso1987 Nov 21, 2020
Thank you. This car is her “baby”. I have thought of selling it because she doesn’t need it, but I fear I would NEVER hear the end of that. She can be so mean. She unfortunately doesn’t remember anything and thinks I misrepresent what has happened.
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