My Mom is in Hospice care. I don't feel this service is what I expected. Can anyone share their experiences with Hospice?

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The first hospice company I used was unresponsive and the doctor didn't visit my mother during a whole week she was with them. I made the change to a larger hospice company and although they have been there, the quality of their staff and help is not as good as people said it would be. All around I'm not having a good experience and I'm not sure what I should do. My mother was transferred from the home to one of their facilities and I'm so disappointed as to how poorly organized and dirty this place is... Any suggestions? Using hospice is making this process more stressful rather than easier....

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I'm so sorry! Like anything else, all hospices are not equal.

The hospice in my community (we only have one) is a non-profit and absolutely wonderful though they don't have a facility. My parents were in a terrific nursing home at the time of their deaths so hospice worked seamlessly with them. I've talked with people who've had hospice in the home and they also had a great experience.

We did have a for-profit come into town but they only lasted 9 months. I'm not sure why but I think because the one we have is so good they couldn't get a foothold.

I don't know how many other choices you have and moving your mom at this stage is very hard for both of you. It's terrible that not all hospices are what they should be because everyone is so vulnerable at the time they need the services.

You could see if there is yet another service (possible if you live in a large city). Otherwise, you'll need to spend as much time with your mom as possible and bug the doctor to keep on top of things.

Again, I'm so sad for you. This just shouldn't happen but I know that it does.
Carol
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I too am so sorry you're having a bad experience with hospice. This is a time when you should be able to breathe easier, not be more stressed out.

Is it possible to take mom back to where she was and have hospice there?

In what way are they causing more stress?
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I'm sorry about your experience. Not all hospice services are equally good. Sometimes people have expectations that don't quite match hospice missions and that causes frustration, too.

My husband was on hospice 5 weeks in our home. The Doctor never saw him but had his records and could advice the nurse. The Nurse had authority to take actions on her own. I considered this bypassing of red tape a big benefit. There was no intention to cure my husband; he didn't need a doctor.

My mom was on hospice for 3 months in a nursing home and she did not see the hospice doc either. The additional attention from hospice staff was very helpful. Mom recovered enough that she was discharged from hospice back to regular nh care.
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I am also sorry to hear this. I thought my mother in law's (in home) experience was terrible. Is there another hospice? If not can you get her into a good regular nursing home? They can also provide medication as needed for your mom (if I'm wrong someone please correct me. Hospice isn't the only place with access to morhine, though.) They might even have a better range of medication options for her.
I do hope your remaining days with your mom can somehow be less stressful.
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We had hospice thorugh the VNA here in NY for our daughter, who had Leukemia. The last week of her life we were all snapping at each other. Looking back, it was the grief that made us find fault with everybody and every thing. On her last day, my son kept insisting she needed to get up, get out of bed. I said no. So he went to her room and sat her up. She passed out cold. He spent the rest of the day drinking and was out cold himself when she died at 2AM. I know you want the doctors there, but watching a patient slide down that hill is devastating for them too.
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Thank you Carol.
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Thank you all for sharing your experiences.
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