Mom recently moved to an AFL, and she seems to have adjusted to her new living arrangements, which we are thankful for. The problem is that her income does not cover her expenses on any month. The family is contributing to her care, but I find that I, as her only caregiver in the area, am constantly having to subsidize her more than the others. She calls most every week with requests for "extras", which are not fitting in to the budget. Today, she telephoned with a list of items for me to pick up, some were necessity items, but most of the things were "snacks" for her to keep in her room. The list was lengthy....itemized, and how many packages of each that she expected, and where to shop for them! Now, I don't mind taking some treat for her when I visit, but knowing how tight things are financially, I do find myself resentful when I have to pay for these items myself. I guess, the question that I have is, how accommodating should I be? I should also add, that she is diabetic, and she gets very irritated when I show up with sugar free anything. I have explained that we are all contributing to her care, but I get the sense that she feels it is our duty to do this. After our Father died, my husband and I went over her finances, and we told her that if she would live within her means, she would have enough assets to live comfortably. When I observed later that she was overspending, and I cautioned her about it, I was told it was none of my business. The rest is history....now, I'm left to make sense of her finances, and try to make ends meet. I am nearing the end of my career before retirement, and I am resentful that I am having to fund her living expenses, when it should not have been like this. I know that this probably sounds very trivial compared to the problems that others are dealing with concerning caregiving, but I am frustrated with the financial situation. Are my feelings justified??