I have spent 10 1/2 months on my days off sorting through my parents belongings, to eventually put the home up for sale. My mother was a horrendous hoarder and tossed almost nothing away. I have found lids off of cans she kept. Cotton from pill bottles, dirty bandages and the list goes on. I managed to get complete POA over both parents finances because my mother spent her entire pension checks on Avon products she would never use. I have thrown out thousands of dollars in expired Avon. I would like to strangle the rep for taking advantage of her, but she knowingly bought all this stuff. If she would have put this wasted money in the bank she would be set up quite nicely. My husband has helped when he could, but he is a contractor and can't offer as much help as I needed. I have been managing their finances for well over a year, working full time and caring for my own family as well. Not to mention a 4 hour return trip to their home and back. My parents are now in a care facility. Thank God !!!!! But the neediness has not stopped.
My husband and I have worked ourselves half to death to try to get the home ready for showing and sale. My dad is acting like some idiot that has just won the lottery and buying drinks for the whole bar. His property is worth quite a bit and he has a list of benefactors that have done nothing for him over many years including his useless brother. But he feels they should all be showered with his new wealth. He has thrown me to the wolves again over getting "HIS" house ready. I am an only child and just turned 59 yrs. old. I'm exhausted and worn out both emotionally and physically. My husband and I threw away 4000 lbs. of junk from their house and filled a 20/6/9 dumpster. My dad has accused me of mismanaging his bank account. He has no money to mismanage, only his pension checks are in his account. I have to keep very close tabs on what comes out of his account, seeing he still has expenses from the house until it's sold.
He has no interest in even trying to take any responsibility for any of his finances to keep his mind active and he could. He just wants to sit, veg out and read stamp magazines and b**ch about how he was last to be taken down to breakfast.
Growing up I was the recipient of many beatings with his belt because he has a wicked temper and my mother did nothing to stop him. To this day I have never forgotten his brutal discipline tactics. I have been caring for their every need for 23 years now and spent thousands on gas from travelling to and fro. Not to mention shuffling work schedules to accommodate their constant needs. They had home support as well for 8 years because their needs far exceeded what I was able to do and hold down a job and look after my own stuff at the same time.
Many times I have said to my husband I wanted them both to pass on so I would be free of their constant needy, thankless crap. My close friend who is in the same boat referred to it as "Being a parent to a spoiled, terminally ill child".