Long story short, I am wondering what my rights as a family member who has a parent at an ALF. A resident and my father have become friends and she has become VERY attached to him. They sat together at meals, visited each others apartments, etc. My father has a short term memory problem and can not always remember things too well. Having said that, the woman he became friends with has taken me on as her personal enemy. She has called me names, has made what would be threatening gestures to me, sworn at me in front of other residents, and more. She has all her faculties and is totally aware of what she is doing. In addition, she is very interested in the money she "thinks" he has. He now tries to stay away from her because of all this, but he doesn't always remember why he has to stay away. His short term memory is failing. I am also a volunteer at this facility. I want to know what are my rights as a family member and guest at the facility and volunteer. I am so frustrated I am beside myself. I have kept my distance for weeks because I don't want her to cause a scene because I am there, and she has. I have decided nothing, not even her will keep me from my Dad. I know about resident rights ...but what about mine? I have talked to administration and they said they understand and are trying to help the problem but I feel like I am spinning my wheels. I am new to the whole senior assisted living system and don't know what to expect as far as an issue like this. Thanks for listening ….
Do not avoid seeing your dad because of her.
I would give the administration a heads up that if she verbally attacks you or bothers your dad you will be using law enforcement to put a stop to the harrassment.
It sounds like she needs some happy pills.
Good luck and let us know what happens.
Was she there before your dad? Does the administration indicate if she had this problem with anyone else before your dad?
Do any other of the longer term residents, staff or volunteers seem to know her or be friends with her?
I guess I’m hoping she will become attached to someone else. Perhaps if your dad could find another buddy she would move on?
I’m sorry you are having to deal with this.
Be patient. The family probably needs to make some decisions. The facility calling a Ombudsman in may mean the facility wanted to know how to handle the situation.
The family is going to need to find a facility with a bed and make arrangements.