There's been a rift in communication between my siblings about my dad's care. One sibling considers himself the primary contact. Advice?

Call hospital and ask to talk to social services department or case manager. Explain that your brother does not have power of attorney and he is not the only person to be involved in your father's care. Let them know all the family members who should be contacted: spouse (if any has highest power of authority), then all children, and lastly grandchildren (if children are not mentally competent). Do not be surprised if the hospital asks you to all be part of a meeting (or several) to deal with this matter. From the hospital's point of view, it is easier to have only 1 person to contact for the family or to make decisions about a patent's care. Maybe you will need to be the contact person for the entire family.

Unless your father designated you as his health care proxy then your father has to give the hospital permission to talk to you.

If you know for a fact that your father hasn't been diagnosed as incapacitated then he can certainly designate you as his Medical Representative right there in the hospital if that's his desire. Ask them for the form, they will have it there. Does not even need to be witnessed or notarized.

My mother filled out a form so that her doctors and the hospital can talk to all 5 of her kids. At least we know what is going on now.

It is Covid-19 times now and everything in all care facilities is very taxed. I would say that the facility has a right to limit communication to one appointed family member who will then pass on that information; they cannot talk to say five members daily; no time for that.
I would contact a social worker and say that currently your brother is acting as contact and you are not getting information. She can arrange for your Father to appoint as medical POA or as contact those members he wishes informed about his condition.

"My brother has all hospital staff convinced not to talk to anyone but him."

No need for your brother to have said a word to convince anybody about this. Unless your father has authorised the hospital staff to speak to you, it's The Law. They can't.

You have no particular right to access your father's confidential medical information. That decision is your father's to make.

Consider the possibility that your brother is rushed off his feet and doing his best for your father in spite of these very challenging times. Don't get shirty about his not consulting you and don't second-guess. Are you close enough to be of any practical help to either of them? Who is/are the other sibling(s)?

Is he poa? Do you talk to your brother? I think a lot of nursing staff won't talk about care bc they dont have a pt's Hippa paperwork in front of them. They cover their butt. Talk to nurse in charge of his care. They may be able to look at his paperwork for you. Or the charge nurse.
If your dad is aware, can you get him to sign Hippa paperwork so you can know about his care in the hospital?
Do you know your dads lawyer? Maybe you can ask if your name is on any paperwork? That really stinks that you can't find anything out. Go or talk/call charge nurse to find out. Good luck.

Ask the hospital and/or your father's doctor if you are on your father's list of people with whom they may share information. Most people have had to fill out such paperwork.

I would wonder what my brother was hiding.

When my mom was in the hospital they gave her medical information to me because I was selected by mom to be the medical power of attorney. She needed rehab and I selected the facility for her.

When my mom entered rehab after a hospital stay, the nursing home asked me to fill out all of the necessary paperwork.

I was the medical power of attorney and completed all of the forms.

There was a spot on those forms that specifically asked who would have permission to have access to my mother’s health records. I filled that space in with all of my siblings names, my husband and daughters.

Is your brother the medical power of attorney for your father? If he is and did not list your name on the contact list, due to HIPPA laws you will not be privy to his medical information.

It sounds like perhaps your brother is the sibling who lives closest and ends up with the hands on care and emergencies, maybe you live in another state? If this is the case you might try to put yourself in his shoes even though it doesn’t sound like he’s putting himself in yours. It’s hard being the “on the ground” point person particularly in a major health crisis like your dad has had, even with medical knowledge and experience we all make mistakes and are simply doing the best we can at the time. Hospitals even pre-COVID often request that their be one “contact” person for the family so they aren’t fielding the same questions and having to go over the same details to multiple people, it takes time away from care, I imagine now with the addition of COVID it’s even harder for them so I might not start with trying to get the nursing staff to intervene until you have something simple for them to do like add you to your dads HIPPA info at his request or something.

You mention “siblings” are there other siblings involved? Has your relationship with this brother always been strained or have you not been particularly close and this is causing the strain? If you are able to go visit yourself that is probably the ideal way to introduce yourself to the caretakers, get info and make sure your status as HIPPA approved. If that isn’t possible and really even if it is I suggest taking it upon yourself to offer help. Organize your siblings, offer to be the info person, do the things you can via internet and phone to help care for dad and take some of the burden off your brother, remember this is his dad too and even if he hasn’t shown it there is an emotional piece for him as well which can make decisions and communication harder. Many hospital systems these days have a portal system for communicating with doctors and seeing what’s going on, though admittedly hospital stays often aren’t included until after the patient is gone, still offering to get that set up and being really transparent about it, like here is the sign in info as soon as you create it... may go a long way in helping your brother accept you as part of the team. Offer to keep all the important family members up to date for him, all he needs to do is call or text you each day with updates and you will take care of everyone else or if your relationship is too strained for this perhaps another sibling could take this on. I live 5 hrs from my mom and brother who is her “on the ground” person but we work as a team, I do all the doctor communication, he does most of the visits unless I’m around to do them, I do all the medication ordering and supplies he fills her dispenser and makes up the insulin syringes (again unless I’m in town and can do it), we communicate all the time and though our youngest brother is on the other side of the country and can’t do as much day to day he is always there when we really need him even just for a break. Her stroke and subsequent medical problems has in many ways been a blessing for our sibling relationship because it forced us to spend a chunk of time together for the first time since we were kids, just us while she was in the hospital and it forces us to be in communication almost daily to update each other which has been a great thing for all of us and our families. I’m not saying all families will be able to do this but it can be an opportunity to come together in some form out of love and catering for your parent.

The other important thing of course is to organize and make sure everyone knows what the legal set up and your dads wishes are now and in the future without making your brother feel like he’s being threatened or attacked. Maybe he already feels guilty about this bad decision he made, are sure he knows you know he did the best he could at the time, poor designs are made all the time in these circumstances and frankly having siblings to bounce them off of helps immensely! Having the legal ducks in order helps in the future.