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I need to have a hysterectomy in January. It will be major surgery since I have fibroids the size of a newborn so it will be 8-10 weeks recup time and absolutely NO lifting of any kind (which means no transfers). I wanted mom to be in a NH for at least a month and then have home care in for her after that. Her neurologist says respite care for something like this is generally only 2 wks. That seems odd since people do have to have surgeries and such. Mom has Stage 4 PD has become incontinent at night and is showing cognitive decline. (Personally, I think she needs to be in the NH permanently and was hoping this would be a way to ease her into it but that may or may not work but definitely while I have surgery she needs to be somewhere.

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Thanks Jeannegibbs. First mom needs a dr's note to admit her and to get TB tests. Mom has LTC which would pay for respite care 80/20.. The sales rep @ facilities I called said to also contact VA since my dad served in the army. We'll see how this goes. After Thanksgiving I will move full throttle on getting mom on board, visiting facilities and doing what needs to be done
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If you think it is time for her to be in a care center, start working on that. Can she afford to pay? Would she qualify for Medicaid? Getting her settled in an NH really sounds like the best solution.

Her neurologist may be the absolute best expert on parkinson's in the area, but that doesn't make him an expert on respite care.

What it really comes down to is who is paying? Can Mom afford to pay for a month or two months of respite care? If so, no problem. You will be able to find some place that will do that. No money? Then insurance is going to dictate what is available and for how long.

If you have picked out an NH, discuss the situation with them. You might also discuss the situation with a social worker at the hospital where you will be having surgery.

At least you did not leave this to the last minute and you have some time to work with.

Good luck on resolving the respite care issues, and also on your surgery!
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