Respect and protocol concerning POA, what are your thoughts?

Follow
Share

My sister is the first on my moms POA, then me, then my brother. My sister went on a vacation and did not let anyone know. Should she had let the facility know she is gone and to call me being I am next on the POA? For me it is just being considerate. What are your thoughts? thank you!

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
11

Answers

Show:
I also did check and both medical and financial have unavailable stated in it. Thanks for pointing that out!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I went to see my mom yesterday and asked at the front desk what they would prefer when the POA is out of state on vacation. They said they would want to know and all they do is put a sticky in moms file with the dates the POA is out of town so they can save time and call the next in line on the POA in an emergency. The facility mom is in only has 12 residents, so small and intimate. I have personally had no problems finding out information on moms medications, etc. when I have asked to see them.
I was just curious to see what others thought and I appreciate everyone's thoughts!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

1lovingmom, as mentioned earlier, with modern technology one can be anywhere in the world and get and transfer information from the senior facility.

Usually the POA only moves to the second agent in line when and if the original POA agent is seriously ill and is unable to perform as POA.... or finds him/herself no longer wanting to be POA.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Check the POA document. Mom's medical and financial POAs had a statement that the backup agents could act if the POA was "unavailable". When I dropped off Mom's POA to the hospital and pointed out that passage, the clerk said my siblings as the backup agents would have no problem acting on Mom's behalf.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

thanks for all the input. I found out about her being gone from my sister-in-law at a support group meeting. They live next door to each other and I live an hour away. I guess my biggest concern is, what if both my brother and I were also going out of town during the time she was gone on vacation and there was a medical emergency (she has both durable and medical POA) and no one has knowledge of where my sister is or what is going on. It is not a big deal to tell the facility but having a heads up that I could be called I think is just being courteous and good communication goes a long way!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Your sister went on vacation and didn't let anyone know..?

Well. Clearly she let *someone* know. Or else - how do you know?

I think the reason there is some resistance to replying...

"of course, as a matter of courtesy, one keeps both the facility and one's deputy informed on at least a 'need to know' basis"

... is that there doesn't in fact seem to have been a problem? And therefore, other than correcting your sister's slight lapse in manners, is this anything you actually need to pursue?
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My husband is 1st on the POA list for his parents. We live 5 minutes away from their Assisted Living facility. When we go out of town, we let the ALF know--mostly so they know we can't be there in an emergency, but that should still call us.
I suspect your sister didn't want to confuse the staff where your Mom lives with further directions regarding who to call. Believe me, adding special notes and phone numbers to your Mom's chart would just muddy the waters of your Mom's care.
I suspect your sister expected this to happen.
1. Mom falls, they call her as they alway do.
2. She tells them she is away.
3. She calls you and asks if you'd be able to look in on Mom because she is not able to.

Since she is the primary POA, it is unlikely she meant any harm in not telling anyone. The nursing staff at most facilities are already overworked. Adding additional, temporary information to your Mom's chart would just cause confusion. Confusion in a time of emergency is not what your Mom needs. It sounds like your sister did exactly what was best for your Mom.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Who has medical POA? (Healthcare proxy)?
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I agree with Jeanne. Did she tell YOU that she was going out of town?

We learned that giving mom's NH " too much information" confused them. Keeping it simple ( one person for them to call) always made better sense. If my POA brother was away, I called more often to check in with the nurses.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Was POA still reachable by phone? If so, they could continue to reach her and therefore I don't see a need to notify the facility. It might be a courteous gesture, but not required.

If she got a call from the facility and Mother needed some attention she could direct them to the appropriate person to call.

My mom's nursing home had a list of her children, in order of preference for calling. If the first on the list couldn't be reached, they called the second, etc. Does the facility your mom is in have a list?
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.