Should I report my brother to social services if I believe that he is exploiting our mom for financial gain? - AgingCare.com

Should I report my brother to social services if I believe that he is exploiting our mom for financial gain?

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My brother has isolated my mom in his home state of NC even though my mom has lived on long island for 82 years. Three years ago when my father died, my sister was against selling my mom's home that she could have lived in free and clear. My brother claimed that he was going to care for mom for the rest of her life at his home in NC. and that no one could care for mom like a family member could. He and his wife were unemployed at the time. Me and my sister were not. Two years later, my mom had a nervous breakdown bc my sister-in-law didn't really want my mom living there and was giving her a hard time about leaving her coffee cup around and piling up to much laundry. My sister and I come to find out that my brother never told his wife his promise to us about caring for mom in his home. Subsequently, my sister-in-law kicked my mom out and told her never to come back. My mom was brought to an asst living place in SC and told that she could try it out for 3 mo. She also looked at some on Long Island but they were much more expensive and my brother, I think, convinced her it wasn't worth it and to stay in NC. In the meantime he has been playing the stock market with her money. Of course he says mom agrees with his decisions emailing me and my sister that mom brought 17 thousand dollars worth of Pepsi today. Mom never even owned a check book and she is 86. Also he makes her live on her interest only-not allowed to touch her principal. She trusts him and is afraid to say anything negative for fear that he won't take her to lunch or to the pool once in a while. No one else is close enough to visit her on a regular basis. I want to move her back to Long Island where she has 2 daughters, 6 grandchildren, 1 great-grandchild and a host of siblings and friends. She doesn't want to talk about it bc she says its cheaper there in NC and she wants to leave us a big inheritance. Is my brother abusing his so called trust with my mom to his benefit?

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I'm so sorry! This is frightening. Social services may be able to help, but you may need an elder law attorney. You are right that this is a very bad situation, so please do try to get some help so that your mom can be properly cared for. She needs to understand that her money is for her care and not worry about inheritance.
Good luck,
Carol
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You need an elder care attorney in whatever state mom is residing in. I'd suggest taking the time (either you or your sister since you seem to be on the same wavelength) to go to see her, speak with social worker at the facility and get names of elder care attorneys from the social worker and meet with them,

About his using mom's $ so far, well this will be all uphill battle in changing what he has done in the Pepsi past. Unless she was incompetent at the time, she allowed it to happen. Was it right and just, well probably NO but I'd focus on the future and how to safeguard her existing assets to provide for that. You need an attorney.
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