Reimbursement for gas expense. How can I approach mom about this? - AgingCare.com

Reimbursement for gas expense. How can I approach mom about this?

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My mother who lives independently relies on me to transport her to get to her doctors appointments and other places she needs to get to. She will not drive herself nor use any form of senior transportation services. I live quite a distance so those trips cost me in gas expense. My mother has never offered to help cover the cost of the gas expense. I am not rich and it would help to be reimbursed. It takes one hour just to get to her house and an hour back. All I want is the cost of the gas I use to transport her to the places she needs to get to. How do I approach my mother about this without sounding like it is a burden on me. I would really prefer her to use other tansportation means and use our time together as a visit instead of being a chauffeur, I do not have the time to do both.

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It sounds like she wants your company more than she wants transportation. Apparently you being with her makes her more secure. As for the reimbursement, she might get angry and tell you how many of your diapers she paid for. Choose your battles carefully, or you will regret them all later.
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Just explain to her that it's expensive to drive her around and if she doesn't have you she would have to pay someone else.. Most of the time we have to make the hard decisions and say things to our parents that make us extremely uncomfortable...But the tables are turned and you are the caregiver now.. You have to basically tell her "this is how it is now"..
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Excellent idea, but my mother would just reschedule her appointments for another day. My mother has always looked for the easiest way to live her life regardless of how it may affect others. The biggest problem is she has COPD and needs oxygen when mobile and finds walking too far is unmanageable. She has a rolling walker, but would rather use a wheelchair to get about except she refuses to purchase a lightweight transport type. She says she is not ready for a wheelchair, yet expects to use one at the medical facilities. Her misplaced sense of entitlement can be very frustrating.
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Try an experiment, next time she has an appt you can set up the senior ride ahead of time for her, then the day before tell her your car is in the shop and you found her a ride.
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