Any registered domestic partners still out there? - AgingCare.com

Any registered domestic partners still out there?

Follow
Share

I am becoming the primary care giver for mine, and would love to chat about how medicare is really paying and or categorized our family status....what kinds of estate issues have come up...etc. does it go according to the regular estate rules or do we need some specific documents that im not aware of? We have advanced directives and power of attorney and poa for healthcare...im curious to hear other experience and make some connections. My partner is a great guy..he is starting to have significant health issues and I want to make sure this younger generation of medical people understand that I am his legal spouse, and vice versa. Seems like the history of the domestic partner law has faded to distant memory...and while I advocated for it with my former partner, as times have changed, for a lot of folks, we still, to my understanding, cant get married, as we are both on social security and would take a huge hit on income. Also it will mess up his divorce settlement/retirement package if we did, and neither of us wants to do that. He is on good terms with his ex and she is a nice lady. We have spent holidays together, with his kids. Any experience?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
9

Answers

Show:
good question.Ruthieruth...not Everyone here is traditional !!!!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

So once again, if someone is actually IN a domestic partnership in CA, that is who i am interested in hearing from. THANKS
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

So am I........
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

No need to be sarcastic, ruthieruth. I'm not interested in including or excluding anyone - I'm just stating the facts as I understand them.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

That would be why i am asking now the question about looking for domestic partners, now, wouldn't it? Most spouses see their caregiving role as primary, not their marital status. Way to be all inclusive though, that really helps!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I'm glad you clarified that, ruthieruth. Yes, the fact that you're in California makes the situation much more favorable as far as entities that are governed by state law. I'm not surprised that you're getting contrasting advice about Medicare, though. It can take many years for things to shake out when the states make laws that have no parallel in the federal system.

I wonder if you could find an online (or not) group dedicated to people living in domestic partnerships in states where they're recognized, to share stories and compare notes with similarly-situation people. We here are much too focused on caregiving per se, and most of us are adult children or traditional spouses.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Actually, we are required to be recognized as legal spouses in my state, and I am getting cinflicting legal advice regarding medicare...medicare also has given me inconsistent information. That is why I am specifically looking for others who share my legal stats, preferably in California. Thanks!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

You need to sit down with an attorney who specializes in this. Medicare should be consistent but Each state is approaching Medicaid differently and the spouse/ nonspouse issue needs legal advice. I anticipate at least a decade of wrangling depending on where you live and long term care planning.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Domestic partnership is not a recognized legal status, except where it is. In other words, certain municipalities and states recognize domestic partnership and provide a mechanism for registering a domestic partnership, but I don't believe it's recognized on a federal level or for a lot of other purposes. Many employer pension plans as well as health plans recognize domestic partners. However, I'm not sure medical providers are necessarily required to recognize you as legal spouses; I think your best protection is those POAs and health care proxies, which you seem to have covered.

No, I'm not in a domestic partnership. I'm a retired lawyer who specialized in employee benefits, and we often advised clients on how to deal with domestic partnerships.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Related
Questions