I have a very nefarious sibling who is POA for parents. Dad has dementia. Mom is so busy taking care of Dad, she hardly gets any sleep.
Anyhow, (see my other posts), their POA is my older sister who is constantly trying to come out "ahead" even if that means putting me down. We had a come-to-Jesus meeting with Mom, her attorney, POA (on Skype), me, and my attorney.
I gained a minor victory when Sis (POA) backed down on her crazy idea I should accept an old motor home in lieu of a share of the estate after they died. (I spent a dozen hours and found a dealer to pay $18K for it, whew!).
However, my Mom (in the process of their large house move-out) gave me a gift of property worth about $10,000. It was all signed by Sis and the parents' attorney. It was so smooth, in retrospect, I should have been suspicious.
I didn't think it was a bad idea, UNTIL, I read about how Medicaid will delay paying nursing home, until the gift amount is compensated for.
SO.....is there anything I can do, at this point, to protect my parents? Do I have to come up with the cash to pay nursing home bill, since I accepted the gift of items valued about $10K?
They don't want the items back as they are moving. Sis is waaaaay out of state and could care less about the household items. She counts them as valuable ONLY if they would be given to me....but if she had to empty the house she's said she would just donate it all to charity!! Talk about a double standard!!
But anyhow. Am I totally screwed here? I feel duty-bound to provide services to my parents (mom tried to pay me $10/hour but Sis objected, whereas the paid caregiver gets $22/hour no problem).
I know it's "easier" for me to provide caregiving, since I live close by. But, at the same time, if I lived 10 hours away, I would be able to promote my career and take vacations on a moment's notice (as my siblings obviously have been able to do). I know some may accuse me of being jealous. But, my parents have always tried to keep things "equal."
What is equal about any of this? Once there is a Power of Attorney (who is also Executor and Trust distributor), it is automatically and emphatically UN-equal.
The POA, Executor and Trust documents in this case, do not require any accounting! Sis can do anything she wants, (such as Travel & other expenses she has already written herself checks for!!!) and there is no way any of the other siblings would ever know about it, once Dad & Mom are gone.
It seems so very unequal to me. I do all the work, Sis takes mere phone calls, and in the end I may have to pay cash to compensate for a silly gift.