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I have an appointment to meet with the doctors, therapists, and the social worker taking care of my dad in rehab this afternoon. This is the first time we've gotten together and I'm wondering what kinds of questions to ask. Can anyone who's been there (or not) give me any advice? Thanks!

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Blannie had great suggestions. You need to know what the prognosis is. What kind of help he'll need and what limitations he'll have. Medication knowledge is essential, especially any recent changes.

I hope you have all of the legal paperwork in place so that you can make decisions for your dad about his health. It sounds like you do, since you're going to this meeting, but do ask at the meeting in case there's something else that should be in place.

Most likely, they will have directions and printouts for you. When you look the information over, you'll think of more questions. Make sure you get the names of the people in the meeting and the contact numbers in case you think of other questions.

Take care and best wishes. We'd love to hear back about how you are doing,
Carol
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It would help us if we knew more about why your dad is in rehab. It appears he's living with you? If so, I'd ask what kind of support he'll need when he comes back home. If they think he can recover enough to come back home? I'd ask about what limitations he'll be living with when rehab is done and what special accommodations (equipment for example) you'll need at home to care for him. Did his medications change? I'd ask about that. Any special considerations because of the medications he's on - like dietary changes, etc. That's what I can think of without knowing more about why your dad was in rehab and what his general health is like. Good luck!!
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When my dad was in the NH, at his first care plan meeting I didn't write anything down and it was a month later that it came to my attention that I had not followed up on an issue and as a result we had a big mess on our hands. I called my brother, sobbing, and he jumped in for the first time and started helping me. My point? Oh yeah! My point is to write everything down and if you are assigned any tasks on your dad's behalf make sure they get done ASAP.

Good luck!
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Well if he's doing better in rehab and the hospital than in living at home, that's your answer right there. You're obviously a very loving child and your dad is lucky to have you. So if that's the case, I'd be asking them about the appropriate facilities for your dad as a next step. You can still be as involved in his life as you want to be, with the comfort of knowing he's got 24X7 care and is getting the care he needs as he moves through the stages of Alzheimers. Hugs to you. Please let us know how the meeting goes.
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lgregg, I had to go back and look at every post you wrote about your dad to figure out WHY he needed to go into rehab in the first place. In your last post you said your dad was in the hosp. because he had become weak from diarrhea and he wasn't eating, so I'm assuming that's why he's in rehab? In that case, everything that Blannie said seems logical to me. I DID read in one of your earlier posts, that your dad said he never wanted to go into a 'home' of some sort. I think that when someone says that, they have NO IDEA of what kind of shape they'll be in at the end of their life. In my opinion, if that person had had any idea of the devastation that Alz/dementia causes the family left to take care of them, in their own home because of a promise made BEFORE they got sick, they NEVER would've made that family member swear not to put them in 'a home'. In my grand parents' day, being put into a 'home' was the worse thing an old person could think of doing to a family member. But in those days, asst living, adult foster care or a memory care facility didn't exist, and most nursing homes were a nightmare. That's why when I read about a son or daughter that are killing themselves taking care of their 80+ year old parent in either their home or trying to keep that parent in THEIR own home because of a promise made when the parent was still healthy or not very ill, it makes me want to say 'FOUL'! ♥
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I've been to a couple of these meetings for my mother in a nursing home, and I've made it a point to think of any questions I have or any problems I see, and then print out a copy of these for everyone at the meeting. This makes certain each item is brought up and at least discussed if not solved, and there is a written record that it was brought up. It's also convenient to write the comments and suggestions on this sheet to remember everything.
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blannie, it's been interesting. When my dad was in the hospital, and then rehab, I was absolutely dead set that he should come back home and live with me, with live-in help. But visiting my dad at rehab has made me think seriously about placing him in a memory care facility. He seems so much more at ease and comfortable. He has been very accepting of being there. He never asks about going home. My dad has vascular dementia and was refusing to eat at home and at the hospital. He was so weak he couldn't stand or walk. He was having alot of trouble with paranoia. So, he went to rehab to eat more, gain strength and have his meds adjusted to try to help with the paranoia (which was causing him not to eat.)
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