Can I put my father somewhere without involving my sister who does nothing but call him? - AgingCare.com

Can I put my father somewhere without involving my sister who does nothing but call him?

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My father is getting to the point that something needs to be done..I'm his sole caregiver..I have a sister but she does nothing but call him every day..He constantly complains about, usually me..we've never been close..Now just about everything he touches, he ends up breaking..hearing aid..phone..AC thermostat, to name a few..And ALLWAYS blames me..When he talks to his daughter he's constantly lieing or execrating..I can hear him.She's not around, nor does she really know him.. Last time she lived around him was in high school..She's 66 now. So I'm sure she has no idea what kind of a pathological liar he really is..OE maybe she doesn't care. She doesn't share the burden and the sarcasm from him on a rail basis..He needs to be elsewhere.. Either in a retirement facility or with her..She would never take him nor agree to put him anywhere.. She has her motives for agreeing with everything he says..So I can't discuss it with her..As long as I'm doing everything and going through h*ll,she's fine..But she'll show up,before he gets cold,when he takes his last breath..I don't know how much more I can tolerate..Can I put him somewhere without involving her?..I'm desperate!!!

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Do you hold POA for him -- financial and medical?

Do you live with him?

Does he have dementia?

A few more details will help get specific answers.
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Pete, sounds like your Dad has dementia, that is one phase of the disease where the person makes up stories. Dad can't help it, it is just part of what is happening to his brain.

https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-handle-alzheimers-disease-lying-144204.htm

As for your sister, not everyone is cut out to be a hands-on caregiver, I wasn't but I was good with logistical things.

Ok, who is Dad's Power of Attorney? Only that person can make decision for Dad. If Dad doesn't have a POA, make an appointment with an Elder Law Attorney to have one drawn up. Make the appointment for during the time of day when Dad is the most clear minded so that the Attorney can speak directly to him with you out of the room. If the Attorney feels your Dad wouldn't understand legal documents, then he/she might recommend you get Guardianship of your Dad.

https://www.agingcare.com/articles/what-is-durable-power-of-attorney-140233.htm

https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-get-guardianship-of-elderly-parents-140693.htm
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