Myself, my husband, and my 20 year old daughter live with my mom who is 80 years old. She is on dialysis three days a week, has severe arthritis, and a whole host of other medical problems. We moved in to get her house ready to sell 10 years ago, but she had health problems and we ended up staying in order to care for her. We live rent free, however, we provide all her transportation to dialysis, doctor appointments, do all her shopping, her laundry, pay for food, medicine, tv, cellphones, gas, etc. She essentially has in home private duty care 24/7.
I have two siblings that live close. They barely help but LOVE to throw it in my face that we live here rent free any time I remind them that I need help. They basically say it's all on us since we live here. I don't have to live here, but it must make them feel better to think that I do.
The issue I have is my brother, who I do not get along very well with, is the executor of her estate. I am the POA for health care and my sister is, well my sister. She seems to be cozying up to him lately, too. I am worried because my brother could essentially put me and my family on the street the same day my mom passes, and I wouldn't put that past him.
I am looking for advice on how I can protect myself and my family in case this does happen. My mom is not well, but I will continue to care for her as long as she is here. I work full time and have FMLA. I have missed a lot of work over the years caring for her, I have given up family vacations, quit working on my masters, etc. because of caregiver demands. And, that's o.k. it's my job. But, I do very much worry about the level of greed my siblings will unleash once she is gone. It isn't fair, that we have given up our lives the past ten years while they go on an just live their lives, then throwing all that in my face when ever they feel those pangs of guilt.
Should I look into hiring my own attorney? I hate to do that, but the way my brother and sister act, I think I need to do something. They're both so ridiculous and in their eyes, it's "my job" because I live here "rent free." I've paid that, ten fold, and as my mom ages and needs more care, I need more help. Thanks.