Any suggestions to ease the process of taking my mother to the nursing home? - AgingCare.com

Any suggestions to ease the process of taking my mother to the nursing home?

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THE DAY....Taking Mother to the Nursing Home......She is 90yrs, Dementia, My husband will keep daddy busy for the day. Dad is "onboard", and understands the need.

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Oops, forgot to answer your question: I'd bring a personal blanket and a SNUGGIE (good for wheelchair covering), maybe some personal items, depending on what she likes: brightly colored soxs are fun. I'd reassure her that you'll be closely watching and helping her get adjusted. One thing to be aware of and prepare for: BIBS! Many of the folks at our SNF can feed themselves, but they sometimes spill food so they are offered terry cloth bibs to wear at mealtimes. This really freaked me out for some reason but it makes sense. I used a bib for Mom at home, so I don't know why I was caught off guard by this.
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It's such a personal decision...and yes, the MOST painful thing I've ever done too.
It hurts even though I know I don't have the resources/facility to keep her with me, and I also know she is UNSAFE being home alone...it's still tough. She was forced into rehab (skilled nursing) due to a fracture. it's been 2 months, 3 Emergency hospital stays (pneumonia and anemia), and she IS doing much better. However, she HATES it (and tells me daily). I KNOW she's getting good care, good food, companionship, and nursing support. She's being cared for so much better than I could give her. I would ask this question to you: what's best for your parent? I would also add that the SNF is much better than I imagined. But even with all that, it's SAD. It's just plain sad, heart-wrenching to watch a once vibrant person age...It's ok to cry. I have met the most wonderful people who live in the SNF, you'd be surprised how happy people can be when they know they are safe. I'm sad for all of us caregivers too. It's like a constant storm cloud over our hearts. I'm grateful for this website because it's the best source of info/support I've found.
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This was a necessary transition for my mom as she was in Assisted Living and her hallucinations became so disturbing to her and others, as well as continual incontinence. It was a difficult walk from the AL down the hall to the secure facility, and I had to be the one to wheel her chair through the door. She is very happy there. My dad lives in the AL and gets to visit her any time he wants.
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I understand some may not like this answer but my Mom is 90 and in my home with dementia. She cannot walk, talk, barely see, is incontinent, and we spoil her daily. I am here to feed her, keep her clean, put music on for her, hold her hand and sing her to sleep. I wouldnt have it any other way. Yes its hard, but I use her small ss for another caretaker so that I can get out and have a break also. Dementia is a lonely disease, if you can handle it, I say keep them home. Good Luck!
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Today was probably the worst day of my life. I had to put my mom into a nursing home. Her dementia had progressed over the past two years that she came to live with me. I've been crying for weeks just knowing that this day would come soon. There's no easy way to do this.
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Crissy: I am anticipating this myself. We need advice from the more experienced bloggers. I can only think of how i felt when they put me in rehab- awful, lonely and abandoned. Lets see who answers this question. Hugs to you Crissy. Come to think of it rehab wasn`t so bad after a week or so and i made a lot of friends. tonio
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I sure don't know. I don't remember the day I did it even, but pain fills my chest when I think about it.

Take a favorite blanket and some unvaluable personal things to make her feel at home. I didn't do that.

It was the hardest thing I have ever done.
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