I'm having problems with an elderly neighbour, I feel bullied. What can I do?

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She has now got her friends involved with her behaviour. I've tried to ask her to let me know what her issue is but she never tells me,, she accused me and my sons for banging on her door, this is while we're at work, it ended up it was Christian aid and delivery. Her friends and her put grass cuttings on my patio through muck up my stairwell and spray water in my shed though the vent, I have now started videoing these antics.. Initially she told me I was paranoid until I told her I have footage. I have begged her to leave me alone, informing her of my own troubles helping my mum through cancer, this has just made matters worse. What can I do, I dread coming home now..

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How long has this been going on? Or is it just recent?

I would have a conversation with the police, ask them to speak to her. If she blows up while they do, it'll be documented that she's an angry person. You may have to do this to create a document trail if you eventually want to get a PPO against her.

And I agree with the others; don't engage with her directly. She sounds unstable.

But keep taking videos and photos for proof.
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MAYBE - Talk to her friends, privately and away from her, to let them know that, but above all, express concern for her when/if you do.
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Police probably have to be involved. My MIL did strange things based on rampant paranoia to some neighbors til police got involved...she eventually needed gero-psych placement. Be careful and avoid any negative statements or interactions. It is no use arguing, beyond, "no I don't think we did that...I can look out and see if anyone else is" or "sorry that is happening, but it isn't us" if you are accused again.
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When someone is making false accusations against you and displaying bizarre behavior, I would be very careful to stay clear of them, because your safety could be at risks. I wouldn't engage in any verbal battle with them. I would suspect that someone is not right with them. Who knows what kind of mental health issue it is, but if you suspect dementia, there are ways to have her investigated.

Because there are so many legal implications due to the ownership of the property, land rights, emotional distress, etc. I would see an attorney first and get their input on your options. They can perhaps intervene and mediate a resolution. Do not underestimate the situation. Perhaps, she is having mental decline and has delusions. It's difficult to say without knowing more about her.
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There was a recent news in which the neighbors did not get along. Both sides kept confronting each other. It kept escalating. Video taping was used as proof. End result? One neighbor shot at other and killed him. Video taping is neutral. BOTH sides are using that video to prove their argument. Just be very careful because this situation can get really bad.

You've already spoken to her. And got nowhere. The more you confront her or vice versa, the more it will escalate. You need to somehow defuse the situation. And do everything legally so that she cannot turn the tables against you. Don't show her any reactions. It's no fun when the person you're torturing is not screaming and crying. (I recall mom spanking us more and harder when we would cry while being spanked. We learned to take the spankings without crying because it meant less whipping strokes.)
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{Q} I told her I think she is rude manipulative and condescending as well as a bully. She said, who told you I was a bully, I said no one but how do you explain your behaviour, with getting other people involved. She couldn't answer.. Do you think she is senile or just nasty?{EQ}

Why are speaking with her?

Choose your fights carefully.

{ her friends and her put grass cuttings on my patio through muck up my stairwell and spray water in my shed though the vent, I have now started videoing these antics..}

Call adult protective services, get their help.

Make a complaint with police.

Get a restraining order force her to move

Why are speaking with her............ make space ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Choose your fights carefully.
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It's an old Victorian villa. She is the lower dwelling and I am the upper, my land is at the back and hers is the front, we have a common drying green which is directly across from my land.. We bought our property 20 yrs ago and she bought hers 6. She's always been rather bossy not just to me but surrounding neighbours, she is an ex school teacher, I have no intention on moving as I would never find another property this size. I think I'm more upset that she can't tell me what I have done, I told her I think she is rude manipulative and condescending as well as a bully. She said, who told you I was a bully, I said no one but how do you explain your behaviour, with getting other people involved. She couldn't answer.. Do you think she is senile or just nasty?
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What kind of place do you all live in? Apartment? Duplex? Separate houses? Is it separate dwelling so that you can make a formal complaint to the homeowner, manager? Video taping is good for proof. If it's a private residence, can you formally file a trespassing complaint. Build a fence in your land's boundary. Worst case scenario which may be impractical and costly- move out. It sounds like the harassment is getting worse.
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