It feels like we constantly have to go through grandma's POA to take care of her. What can we do? - AgingCare.com

It feels like we constantly have to go through grandma's POA to take care of her. What can we do?

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There is a lot of family feuding between the actual brothers and sisters and some of the grandkids had to step up and take care of my grandmother. But I think my grandmother is being taken advantage of. The grandson that has durable POA has recently tried to get legal guardianship of my grandmother but the judge denied it. His wife found out if he received legal guardianship that she could get a check from the state for taking care of her and now since the judge did not grant it they are using grandma like a pawn between the family members. She was just recently diagnosed with dementia. We wanted to get her tested last year but the POA would not let us. It is like we got to go through him to take of grandma. Need some answers on what to do. Thanks.

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http://chfs.ky.gov/dail/ and also http://www.kyelderlaw.com/
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cmagnum is right. If Aunt can still understand the concept of appointing someone to act on her behalf she can easily change the POA.

Think very carefully about having joint POA, however. That means that BOTH people must agree on EVERY decision. In most cases it is better to have a POA and an alternate in case the POA is unable or unwilling to perform duties.
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If you aunt is still competent, she can revoke the earlier POA and appoint someone else. All she needs to do is have someone to take her to see a lawyer. From the sounds of things, you need a lawyer anyhow.
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I have an elderly aunt, 87, who has dementia that has been coming on for several years. About 3 years ago she appointed a neighbor to be her POA since she had no children, or husband, and only nieces and one nephew that lived in different cities. But, now the aunt has reached a worse stage regarding memory, and the police recently impounded her car she was driving, and got lost then escorted her home and took her license. The POA will not communicate with her nieces and a best friend who has stepped in when they found out she was in this condition just recently, as far as no way to go, occasional people coming by to bring food, etc. I am one of the nieces, living the closest to her, 100 miles. I went to see her last week to take her to the beauty shop, she lives in a gated community but she had no toilet paper, no hot water, stacks and stacks and stacks of mailed piled everywhere you looked. On my way driving down, I called my aunt and discovered there was a man with her at home. I talked with him and found out it was the representative from a local Home and Health Care Center who had been notified by her doctor to come out to check on her. The day before the rep told me the nurse had been there and evaluated her and discovered she had not been taking some of her meds since September, that was 2 months. She is a heart patient, with A-Fib and other problems, hip replacement, walks with aid of a cane. I tried twice to call her POA on Friday and then yesterday, Monday. The nurses and now the state are about to get involved with the situation. My aunt wants to appoint another POA. We want two people to share that duty. Can you give me some advice?Time is of the essence. Thank you, M K Blanc
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POA gives a person authority to handle financial and legal matters. It does not confer authority over the person or over medical decisions. Does someone else have medical power of attorney?
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