Can my Dad's POA take over without his knowledge if he is competent?

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I live at my parents house and helped my father take care of my mother when she could no longer care for herself. Took her to all doctors appointment, got up with her several times a night, managed her medications, help her with personal care (bathing, dressing, hair, make up). Consulted with her doctor regarding her illness. After she passed, I started to help my Dad little by little as he became less capable of caring for himself. Similar to what I did for my mother. I have four other siblings who have done little to nothing. My oldest brother made himself POA and now he has taken over all of my father's accounts since he is currently in a rehabilitation center. He also plans on selling his home...all of this without my father's knowledge. He plans on putting my Dad in an assisted living facility. My Dad is of sound mind for the most part....has some confusion but other than that he knows everyone, where he lives, who the president is who the past president is...etc. He does have problem on what day of the week it is or the year. This brother had done basically nothing for him or my mother for many years. My brother's main interest in all of this is getting me out of the house. I can move out but I will take my Dad with me if he is capable since I know he really wants to be with family. My father has enough money to have paid caregivers care for him in my absence (work, social activities, errand, etc). I believe my father has the right to know what he is doing....does he? I have been threatened - by all of my siblings if I tell my father what is going on. I do not want to upset him while he is in rehab so I have said nothing. When should he be told what is going on?

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Top Answer
Tell your father ASAP! Also tell your brother you will alert the police he is stealing from your Dad..

What your brother is doing is illegal..

How did your brother MAKE himself POA? Did Dad sign these papers?

If you don't speak up now, your brother will rob your father blind..
He took my Dad to the bank a couple of years ago so that my Dad could get his accounts in order and make out a will. My father thought that the POA is assigned to carry out his wishes that everything be divided equally among his five children when he passed. He did not realize what it fully meant.
Just like to add that I have not seen any paperwork (copy of the POA) but my brother says that my father's money and home will go directly to his care and nothing else. He told me that I am responsible now for caring for my father's home until I move out. Any bills that come in I must pay even if it is something my father requested. My father and I split the cost of many things. Also, I took four leaves of absences since 2000 to care for my mother and father....no one else did. Also, my paid time off (vac, sick, personal) has been spent for the most part to care for my parents. He has never taken them to a doctor's appointment.
No, your brother who has POA can't take over and make decisions without your dad's knowledge. And selling your dad's house out from underneath him is unethical and wrong. If your dad is competent he needs to know that his house is going on the market. You may need to contact an elder law attorney.
Your brother cannot "make himself" POA. This is an authority which has to be delegated pursuant to a Durable POA, if that's what's at issue, and executed by your father. Unless the document was forged, and/or your father wasn't of "sound mind" when he executed, your father designated your brother to hold the power of attorney.

What authority your brother may have is dependent on the wording of the DPOA, which like a medical POA (or living will) can include whatever authority and medical justification your father wanted and/or recommended by the attorney who drafted the document.

If it didn't require any medical situation to precede your brother's activation of authority, then it could be that he's acting within his scope of authority, although unethically and apparently with great self interest.

Beyond that, what you wrote doesn't make sense:

"He took my Dad to the bank a couple of years ago so that my Dad could get his accounts in order and make out a will. My father thought that the POA is assigned to carry out his wishes that everything be divided equally among his five children when he passed. He did not realize what it fully meant."

It sounds like your father was confused a few years ago between the purpose of a DPOA and a Will, and that your brother's intentions are not just recent.

Was there an attorney involved at all? And does your father actually have a Will?

Frankly, it sounds to me as if your brother is "B'S'ing" and manipulating you by telling you what your alleged obligations are to pay bills, etc. DEMAND to see proof! Make him produce these documents which require you to pay bills, etc., which I doubt really exist.

Somehow you'll need to find any document(s) when your brother is out of the house and see exactly what authority and arrangements they created. Make copies secretly, list the things your brother has done and hire your own elder law attorney as you most likely will need legal (and/or law enforcmeent) intervention to straighten out this situation.

Your attorney can contact the banks and ask for verification of your brother's authority. Sometimes they'll cooperate, but your attorney may have to begin litigation and use the discovery process to get relevant documentation.

If you do have to take this route, raise the issue with your own attorney about getting an injunction to stop your brother from any further action.

I do think your father needs to be apprised of the situation, but I would be very concerned that if he didn't in fact grant this authority to your brother, he would be very upset to realize what's happening behind his back. And the fact that's he in a rehab facility could make him feel helpless to stop the situation and impede his recovery.

I would see a lawyer first before informing your father. And I wouldn't tell the siblings what you're doing until you've seen an attorney.

But there are some other issues that are a bit confusing...why does your brother want you out of the house? Why aren't your other siblings concerned about the financial abuse?
I would have a consultation with an attorney (perhaps it would take an hour or so) and see what your legal rights are regarding the situation. If you like the attorney, perhaps you could hire him. I would have more understanding of your brother if he had helped you out a lot with your folks with errands, caregiving, etc., but unfortunately it sounds as if his primary concern is the inheritance.
Thank you all for your advice. I went through my father's papers and cannot find anything about a POA. I found a last will and testament that names my brother as a personal representative of his estate upon my father's death. To answer the question about my brother's motive -- he is angry because I no longer have a mortgage. I sold my condo when it became to difficult for me to go back and forth from my place to my parents to help with my Mom. Plus my Dad needed help with her during the night. Once my mother passed my brother insisted my Dad move in to an assisted living facility and as he put it "kick her ass out". He told my Dad I was getting rich living there without a mortgage. My Dad did not want to move so I stayed with him. He had to deal with a lot of grief after my Mom passed and we helped each other get through it. I am more than happy to buy my own home and have my Dad move in (rent free), however, I am not sure that will be possible unless I can help him on my own for a least part of the time (that is why he is in rehab). Somehow my brother has convinced my other siblings that I am rich (which is not true) and that I did not help care for my Mom. That cannot be further from the truth! My Dad's sister and her husband are appalled at my siblings. They know how much I sacrificed to help my parents because the rest would not. They know I have been taken advantaged of. I would love to challenge him because right now he is walking around like he is King! My Dad's sister said to me...."you do all the work and now he swoops in a takes over telling you what you are responsible for and how soon you have to move out". Does anyone know if he is required to show me proof that he is the POA and what he does have power over?
No. A POA can't "take over" if the person is legally competent and does not want him to take over.
"siblings who have done little to nothing. My oldest brother made himself POA and now he has taken over all of my father's accounts since he is currently in a rehabilitation center. He also plans on selling his home...all of this without my father's knowledge. He plans on putting my Dad in an assisted living facility. "
i have one sibling, your story sounds exactly like my brother. back when my alcoholic father was still drinking heavily every day and three years before he died my brother called this house, where my parents and i were living, every weekend, using his influence to convince my father that i was a good for nothing freeloader and all his legal documents should be changed. he had himself named as the only POA, previously it was both of us, and began the long death rattle of kick her to the curb, sell the house out from under her if you have to, and the one up north as well. basically do whatever it takes to kill her, up to and including to moving to AL or leaving the state. my brother left home at 17 never came back. despite the fact that he was zero help to my parents, not even gifts, cards, letters, he was using his influence with my father to manipulate the entire family, which continues to this day. he is full of hatred jealousy and revenge, for God only knows what reason. i am single never married no kids, with half a dozen degrees and certificates, a successful career in Manhattan before i got involved in this God awful mess. in the meantime he has been living with countless women, one engagement called off, one marriage, one divorce, two kids he's raising by himself, his ex is nowhere to be found, basically went from good mother registered nurse and wife to missing in action abandoning her kids and husband for a young ex-con she hooked up with in rehab.
siblings like this will have ultimate responsibility for their actions. it is not for us to judge. what is for us to do is to try to protect ourselves from this evil, meaning don't back down and don't let in to their efforts to kill us, that's literally what your brother is trying to do.
It sounds like someone is getting a POA confused with conservatorship. Someone can't just take over unless they have full conservatorship and that costs thousands and thousands to get legally.

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