If I have a POA can I restrict who visits with my parent in a nursing home? - AgingCare.com

If I have a POA can I restrict who visits with my parent in a nursing home?

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I simply want to be informed by the nursing home when someone shows up to visit with my mom when I'm not there and I want to be to decide whether or not to grant someone permission to visit my mom.

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Those of you who were able to restrict were fortunate. In my case, my dad was coherent and the assisted living said it was his right. I contacted the Ombudsmen who also agreed. The only way I would have been able to restrict the certain visitor was to become guardian and/or have his doctor provide a statement saying he was incompetent. Sadly, Dad knew we did not like this visitor and she was feeding him negative ideas about our family. But he con't to say he wanted to see her which was "company" to him. And to add to the scenario, she had not been around for a year until he became ill and was aware of his investments.
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I think the best way to approach this is to ask yourself two questions regarding the people who you would like to restrict visits from: Are their visits harmful to your mom's health OR are their visits disruptive to the facilities proper function? If the answer to either is YES, then I think regardless of having a POA or DPOA or health care proxy, that you can act as an advocate for your mom to get the PHYSICIAN to restrict these visits. And when they are physician's orders, I think they may carry more clout (though, you still have to consider, as another poster commented, that staff is run very thin, and there is a high probability of no one actually seeing/noticing this visitor visiting the floor).
Good luck, MyLadyAlexis!
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YES....if you are DPOA you CAN restrict visitors. I do it now and have for 6 years. But like I said, the NH does not THINK about the "list of visitors" I have when a stranger comes to visit mom. I am the ONLY one who has ever visited mom until the stranger that day...see earlier post. YES....YOU CAN restrict who visits her on paper but the NH honoring that list is another thing.
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Unless your parent(s) live in a facility that all visitors must be buzzed in and out, have to check in with a physical person and/or sign in, it's almost impossible for NH personnel to see who comes in and out the door and which person is visiting which resident. Since the ratio of care giver to resident is definitely not 1:1 the aides are usually up to their elbows in helping someone else and the door is the last thing they look at. Most of the time it's the aides that deal with the residents and they aren't even aware of that bright orange paper that says DNR at the front of a chart, let alone a list of who can or can't visit. I wish you good luck with this.....because it is a hard thing to get accomplished.
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Since I have DPOA which covers health and financial, I give the NH a LIST of who CAN visit my mom. They don't however abide by the list as I found out days later that some guy with body covered with tattoos visited her. I got mad and asked them,,,Was he on the LIST I made???? They said that ...oh....we FORGOT about the list. Before I put mom in the first NH, she had been accepting calls and writing letters to a man in prison for 10 YEARS...he called her collect and ran her phone bill up to 2000 dollars so it was shut off since she only gets 800 a month. Her not having a phone for over a year until she paid it off a little at a time was very hard ...as she could not call me for help as she had always done. SHe'd go to the neighbors and ask to use their phone and they got tired of it b/c it was long distance. I found out eventually who the guy was and looked him on on FB...asked him why he went to visit my mom, etc. He said he used to be her neighbor. Mom had quite a reputation of sleeping with just about ANYbody and I told him that he is NOt on the list to see her and not to go back. I also told the NH...LOOK at the LIST....there IS a reason for it. Mom has not been in her "right" mind since her early 40's and it only got worse from there. NHs really don't care..the 5-6 that I've tried out this past 7 years. The help gets paid very little for a BIG job IF they DO their job but most are just there for the paycheck..it has been my experience.
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my youngest brother is my mothers POA-financial and health She is 82, in asssuted living, in good health. Everytime I have tried to help her and she resists-she says 'you are not my power of attorney' so exactly what does that mean-exactly what can my brother do and not do. The family is okay with the youngest acting as POA-but i dont think he even undestands what that entails.
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Do you also have health care proxy?

Ask the NH what their policy is about such matters.

Is you parent likely to object to excluding the visitors you have in mind?
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POA is only good in dealing with finances, and even if you had DPOA, I'm not sure if you can restrict visitors. Good luck with that.
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