Should Mom's POA give the rest of us kids a copy of her Will? -

Should Mom's POA give the rest of us kids a copy of her Will?


He acts like only he should know. Was just reading some conversations on here and one raised a question. Mom was put in a nursing home by now POA brother, who never speaks to me anymore, and has copied her will in his computer. When we were still speaking 2 years ago he showed it to me and was acting like he was doing me a favor by showing it to me. What I read on here that if there was a dispute on the division of assess that one would have to show a copy of the will to contest such. How would I get a copy now to know? He and his immediate family have already gone they her stuff and divided it amongst them.

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Actually, he was not at liberty to show it to you or anyone else. If you can't remember what it said or who was named Executor, it doesn't really matter. You see, the cost of the Nursing Home will use up all the assets and there will be nothing left to fight over. In a way, that is a blessing.
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Do you know who the attorney is? It's possible you could contact him and ask if he might have an electronic copy although attorneys aren't keeping these anymore and turn them over to the "owner" -- your mom. Maybe your mom gave it to your brother or he secured it as part of his POA diligence as he is keeper of finances. Regardless, if he is selling or distributing property, he should be tracking it and at least have it valued unless mom expressly designated certain pieces to family. He should be doing due diligence by cataloging items, accounts, values, etc. and keep track and depositing monies that may be used for moms care as his POA duties. He shouldn't be gifting himself or his family with valuable items.

If you two are estranged, you might want to call him and have a conversation that you hope he is cataloging and accounting estate items should something happen to mom. Is he executor of will? Are you? Are you co-executors?

I wouldn't argue now, but I would state to him that you and other family members expect the executor to properly carry out the terms of moms will.

Is mom competent or is she deemed incompetent? If she is competent, you can ask her if she would share the will or please ask if she would mind filing a copy with you and other sibs.

These are touchy subjects. My parents shared nothing with us kids. We know they have a will, POA, AMD, but my parents were private and now mom has some dementia with paranoia and she will not trust any of us with a copy. Neither does lawyer have a copy, and mom has hidden it so many times she can no longer find it. Straightening out her estate or making decisions on her behalf if she is hospitalized will be a nightmare for us.
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There is a big difference in POA and Executor of a Will. A POA makes decisions for a person while he or she is unable to make decisions for himself. Their power stops at the persons death. Her items are hers until her death unless she wants them sold and the money used for her care. Who is executor of the will? I would suggest you speak to an attorney. A carefully worded letter from him might help clear the air.
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