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A friend and her elderly (82) husband have gotten along well enough, though he's sometimes been controlling, verbally abusive, and drinks too much. He's retired military. They've been preparing to sell their home and move into senior living. Suddenly his behavior has become erratic. He's different in the morning than in the afternoon. He suddenly decided to divorce her and prepared the papers to file, offering her some money from the sale (house isn't communal property). He would move to another state, also leaving his beloved dog. Today he says he loves her and doesn't want a divorce, but in the same conversation talked about going down to the courthouse to proceed with the divorce filing. He's facing heart surgery soon, has been depressed and paranoid, and has considered suicide. Is it possible he's suddenly experiencing strokes, senility, or Alzheimers. Who should we see besides a divorce lawyer?

SusanJane, your friend should take her hubby to see his primary doctor or go to urgent care to see if he has an Urinary Tract Infection. Such an infection can mimic dementia, and cause strange like behaviors. If there is an infection, antibiotics will help clear it up. Let's hope the issue is a simple as this.
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SusanJane Jan 23, 2019
Thank you, freqflyer! We would never have suspected this and are very grateful to you for taking the time to read our post and share the information.
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Since this is new behaviour, he needs to be be evaluated by his doctor. Maybe its a new med. Doubt if they will do heart surgery until they find out what is happening. Maybe you could call his heart dr and see if they can call him telling him they need him to come in for check up before surgery. Have wife write down all thats been going on and hand to the nurse so the doctor sees it before the exam.
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SusanJane Jan 23, 2019
Thank you, JoAnn29! This is also an important thing to know, and she can start on it immediately.
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He should see a Doctor and a neurologist. However, if he is anything like my dad - he will refuse to go. when his behavior is erratic - she might be able to call 911 and ask that he be taken to the hospital, especially if she is afraid of him. Then she can ask for tests to be done. Good luck to your friend.
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SusanJane Jan 23, 2019
Calling 911 is valuable as an instant action, and she keeps her phone with her. We never thought of that. Thank you, Kimber 166, He's a lot like your Dad. I'll remind her that calling in time could save him and protect herself.
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