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My husband and I have been married 45 years--he is 82 and I am 71 and we never had children. We are currently still Durable POA for each other. At this point he would not be able to oversee the responsibilities of being my POA if it were to ever become necessary as I am his caregiver. I asked my brother if he would be my POA and he did not want the responsibility since he is not much younger than I am which I can understand that. I have a nephew I have always been close too who said he would be glad to take it on if ever I needed someone to take over. I believe he is a responsible and trustworthy and a perfect choice. However, he will be moving from the USA to Europe in a few years with his wife and family to where his wife is from. However, he says he does not see where that would be a problem being my POA due to the fact so much business can be handled electronically nowadays regardless of where one lives. Also, he plans to fly back home to visit sometimes the way they fly back and forth to Europe now to visit his wife's family. I understand all that, but based on personal experience being my mom's POA I know there were times a POA needs to be hands on at times, at least for my mom it was, which was not a problem for me since I was also her primary caregiver and was local. I do not really have any other appropriate family member to ask at this point. My best friend is older than I am, so I know I could not expect her to accept it at this point in time. The more time goes by I am thinking I may just have to be one who will not be able to have a POA and just hope and pray I never need one.


Would very much appreciate hearing any suggestions or thoughts you might have that might help. Thank you.

Be very careful with having a POA who lives outside of the country. It was recently reported in Canada, that having an Executor outside of Canada, can lead to the estate facing taxes in two countries.

It is very important to be certain that the country in which he lives recognizes that the finances he is managing on your behalf will not be considered foreign assets in the county in which he lives.

A Tax lawyer or accountant familiar with the tax laws in both countries would be the best place to get advice.
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Reply to Tothill
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It's been my experience that my LO's banks wanted me to come with the original PoA papers in person. I agree that you will need a fiduciary no matter what. If it were me, I'd chose a firm, not an individual, so that there is accountability and other eyes on your accounts.
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Reply to Geaton777
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websurfer Aug 21, 2020
Thank you.
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Fiduciaries handle the finances usually. I would check into a geriatric care manager to work with the nephew and you, if able, when medical decisions need to be made. Much cheaper than an attorney and specialized training to deal with all things elderly.

https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/basics/info-2020/geriatric-care-manager.html
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Reply to gladimhere
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A well written POA will allow the POA to hire a fiduciary to do things that must be done here. I would think that this can be done now, and in a few years even more easily done, plus which you cannot tell what a few years will change for anything. You could skip the nephew and go to the Fiduciary if you wish to do that, and pay. I would give it to the nephew, myself; you describe him as capable and loyal.He will know how to handle everything. I have had no problems acting as Trustee of Trust for my bro living in another part of our State. You hire a lawyer or fiduciary in the area and it gets done. I think Nephew is correct. If you have real concern I would pass this by an Elder Law Attorney telling them just what you told us. Worth the hour of their time for your peace of mind.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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websurfer Aug 18, 2020
Never thought about that. Thank you AlvaDeer.
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