POA and Executor for Aunt. Her daughter lives in another state. Can POA let her in house to retrieve things?

Let's clarify: Your Aunt has 2 daughters-one who is deceased with 3 living children and one who is alive with ____? living children. Why hasn't only living daughter seen her Mom for 8 years? According to your profile, your Aunt is living in a nursing home. How long has she been living there? How long does she have to live? Why is the attorney saying that no one is legally allowed to be in the house until Aunt dies? How long has no one been in the house? Has anyone inspected the house lately to make sure that it hasn't been broken into or to make sure that the gas and electricity are working properly...or are they turned off?

Please clarify your situation for me. Thanks.

It sounds as though you are talking about small items and mementos and that no one but the daughter cares one way or the other so if it were me I would let her take them. I'm curious though, is the house sitting empty while Aunt is in the nursing home? It seems to me that the POA should be looking at cleaning out, selling and using that asset for Aunt's care, or is Aunt already on medicaid?

Is the house being prepped for sale? Is there something different about this situation that attorney says no one can go in? That is really bizarre. Let aunt take what she wants as long as others have no interest in anything. But get it in writing. Email the grandchildren asking if there is anything they want, hoping for a response from them stating no they do not. Watch your back, these things have a way of blowing up.

Mom's attorney made the same kind of bluster when we discussed pre-distributing some of her assets instead of waiting until after she dies , he saw red flags and I just wanted less $$ payable to probate in the future and a simpler estate. We're in Canada so there are no fears about medicaid and giving away assets, which is definitely something you have to consider in the USA.

Catalog the items in case it comes up later, in case someone asks about it, if no one wants these items otherwise, there's no harm in her having them if no one else wants them.

I think there might be another reason why the attorney felt no one should enter the house until after death. But, first, I think that's a generalized statement and wouldn't include entering the house for purposes of maintenance, monitoring, ensuring any security systems are operating, etc.

While I haven't checked my DPOA language recently, I think the issue might be that the proxy may have authority to ensure integrity of the assets, and preventing others from coming into the house would be aspect of that obligation.

If you really want to give her the items she wants, find them yourself and give him to her, outside of the home. That way you can accommodate her wishes but still preserve the integrity of anything else in the home.

I would be more than suspect, however, since this relative apparently hasn't bothered to keep in touch until she now wants something. In fact, if it were me, I wouldn't give away anything now unless your aunt specifically agrees to it.

Another possibility is that the daughter who currently wants nothing may change her mind after her aunt dies. And if she wants what the apparently disinterested daughter wants, and those items are gone, you're going to be the person who's blamed.

That's another reason not to release anything now. A lot can change after someone dies, and items become more sentimental.

Is this the attorney that wrote the will? I would think that your Aunts wishes are to be followed per her will.

8 years, now wants things from the house? Sounds fishy and it sounds like she wants to get what she wants and be done with her mom. I would not let her rummage and remove items, be present and catalogue every item along with photos to protect your back, as POA you have all the responsibility, be it good or bad. You obviously felt something amiss and that is why you contacted the attorney. Listen to your instincts on this one. As another poster stated, things change when someone passes.

Geeg56, just curious how old is everyone involved? Age can make a difference.

Even though your Aunt's Daughter hadn't come to visit, did she telephone Mom on a regular basis, sent cards and letters? And sometimes family dysfunction can play a role.

Life just happens to get in the way making it hard to travel. Flying isn't that easy since 2009, and as we age it now becomes so very exhausting.

I agree with the other's above about letting your Aunt's Daughter come in to get the items she wants, as long as the three grandchildren are 100% sure they don't want anything from their Grandmother.

I hadn't seen my late maternal Grandparents in many decades when they are alive, but I sent a lot of cards... couldn't talk on the telephone because my Grandparents spoke another language that I never learned and their English was limited.... [sigh].