Can I place my husband in assisted living for respite with my power of attorney? -

Can I place my husband in assisted living for respite with my power of attorney?


He might say he doesn't want to stay but I'll have to just leave. The administrator said he'd be okay and to just get the paperwork finished, the doctors orders and his personal items ready.
My brother passed away and I need to go out of state to his memorial and to spend some time with the rest of my family. I'll be gone 6 days. I'm so worried about how he'll do without me because he's very dependent on me every day.
Now I'm wondering if I can even put him in the home. Does anyone know the difference between a POA and guardianship? I don't want to do anything illegal.

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Thanks everyone for the encouraging words, I know you all are right!
It would be a lot easier for me but this particular AL doesn't seem to be very active. When I went to pick up paperwork for his stay, people just sat around, not talking and just staring at the floor. My hubby is friendly even if confused. He needs some action! I plan to call the administrator and see if I was there at a down time or if there are other more active and talkative people there.
Actually though, I have no choice because this is the only facility here that will take Mediciad when that time comes and the fact that I will put him there permanently is why she is okay with the respite.
Such choices...everything is so hard!
Helpful Answer (1)

Carol, one of my aunts was convinced that my uncle would die if she left him in AL. He finally was admitted to memory care because she couldn't contraol his wandering, and she was getting injured by trying to control him.

He was admitted, she visited every day. She died a few months into his stay, and he lived out several more years, happy as a clam. Go and have a lovely visit with your family!
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Carol, also keep in mind he's going to be seeing and dealing with a lot more people and activity. It may be good stimulus for him. He'll miss you but hell,adjust quickly. You go on now!
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Thanks jeanne, I did already buy my plane ticket and my brothers memorial is not till April 9th. I'm just experiencing those caregiver thoughts about whether I did the right thing.
I have no idea what to expect when I actually leave him there and drive away. Makes me somewhat sick to think about it! In the past 4 years he hasn't left my side until last summer when I got him into our local Adult Day Care. But since then, I've only left him there about 8 times. He does great but I've never left him over 3 hours at a time. To leave him 6 days will be a whole different story!
Thanks for your answer...very encouraging!
Helpful Answer (1)

CarolC75, I think you just have to do what you have to do. You need this chance to connect with your family. You need to remind yourself of the wider world out there. You need to take a little time away. And you will be the better caregiver for it. In the long run, this will be good for your husband. Just do it.

If you flew off leaving him alone, that would be not only against the law but truly criminal behavior. Leaving him in a place that is qualified to take care of him, against his wishes, may be technically beyond your powers as a POA but it is certainly not criminal abandonment. This is an emergency. You don't have time to obtain guardianship.

The administrator is no doubt right. Your husband will be OK once he settles in. He may have a few uncomfortable days, but the AL staff will know how to deal with it.

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Do a wife have rights over a power of attorney
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