How do you get elder up to pee in the bathroom instead of sitting and going in their diaper?

sahk1942,
I soooo understand. It's not only about the "mechanical side" of cleanup etc.
It's also about the way it makes you feel because she doesn't seem to care what she's putting you through. I have the same feelings.
I try to remember that I've never met anyone with character that hasn't suffered a good bit to get there... and that my frustration is working patience side in my own character............still needs work lol !

Can you get a portable toilet to sit next to the bed? Maybe she's lazy, maybe she's afraid of falling or finding her way to the bathroom. Either way, sitting up in bed and only having to pivot a little to find the toilet could be just what she needs.

Get her on a schedule where she goes during commercials every couple of hours. I assume your mom has dementia since you don't say one way or the other in your profile. If she has dementia, her brain isn't working right and you can't expect logic out of her. If she doesn't have dementia, then it's probably more of an issue of mobility and planning.

Even when we know in our heads that the person can't help what's happening, it doesn't always register emotionally. It's easy to think a behavior is intentional--and some behaviors actually may be somewhat intentional because of increased resistance as dementia worsens--because the person fluctuates in capability (knows to go to the freezer to find the ice cream but may eat the peeling of an orange; knows which chairs he doesn't want to sit in but pours drinks on the table or mistakes potpourri for candy). I remind myself daily: 2-year old in adult body.

Good luck!

LadeeN, the onesies are good for people who will undress for no reason or handle the contents of their diaper, if incontinent. You can find adaptive clothing at sites like buckandbuck.

try a an every 2 hr. to bathroom schedule..ask her Dr. if a medicine would help...limit fluids before bedtime.....rewards may help if her cognative thoughts are in tact.....share problem with a family member if possible to give yourself a break...

Yes, the inertia which accompanies dementia does seem like laziness. But my experience is that once our elders reach the stage that they wear diapers, we don't really get them to do anything.

I would love to be in your shoes on that one, believe it or not! I wish my husband would just sit and go in his diaper, but rather when he feels the need to go, either urination or bowel movement, he tries to find a place to do this, and since he doesn't know what a toilet is anymore, will go in any room, on walls, beds, carpets, etc., and even outside in the hedges. I have often felt in this ongoing drama, that the problem I'm experiencing at the moment, later looks like a blessing that I wish I had back again!

If your Mom has dementia, she may no longer get the signal from her brain that she has to urinate. It's hard to stay positive. My Dad has Parkinson's ALH and has no idea when he has to urinate or a bowel movement. The portable potty chair may work too.
Good Luck!

Have you looked at the body suits to help this at preventawear?