My oldest brother is POA. My parents became confused/dependent last year, and we agreed I would handle care and he would handle finances. I was most involved already, lived very close by and had flexibility to help. I hired in-home aides and monitored their care closely. The aides complained that I was too controlling, so my brother took over, excluded me from any involvement in their care, made it very difficult for me to visit, and has not spoken to me in 9 months. He became overwhelmed after a few months and moved them to assisted living, promising to return them home if it didn't work out. My parents became inactive, lethargic, lonely and depressed; their health declined rapidly and they have been hospitalized many times for dehydration, pneumonia, UTI's immobility due to back pain, etc. They are so weak, immobile, and confused after three months in assisted living, that they are now being moved to nursing home. I want to build in-law suite (with my own money) and have them live with me with aide assistance. As another option...a prior caregiver (who visits them) offered to live in their home to provide 24-hour care at $40-50K, plus free rent. (Specific details to be established.) My brother will not discuss any options besides nursing home. He believes nursing home provides best quality care and will lessen his stress. I believe they will decline quickly, and would get better care with individual attention from very experienced, wonderful aide who loves them. My parents want to go home and I want to help care for them as much as I can before they pass. They have Alzheimer's, so I wonder if they can make this decision, allow me to influence and assist with their care, or put me in charge of their care. I do not want or need their money; I want them to enjoy what is left of their lives in a personalized home setting surrounded by people who love them, and think they would do better with more personalized attention.