What to do with a parent that really needs nursing home care but refuses to go?

Arrange for Physical therapy and occupational therapy, in home. BE THERE when they come and watch what they do (preferably from a distance). Then repeat on days they aren't there. The PT told me that just having my Mom stand helped strengthen her legs. So-o I used to place the back of a strong chair in front of her and have her stand holding on to the big chair. It was boring for her so I would plan things to do during this time. Sing a few songs, say a few prayers, etc. First it was 1 minute, then 2 then 5, etc. ( I never left her side and had the wheel chair right behind her). I know what you are facing, my MIL is in the same boat. She is in AL and I suspect she is headed to a NH soon as they won't be able to handle her! Do everything you can to keep her legs strong. She doesn't have to run the marathon, but she should be able to assist in a transfer!

You pursue a court ordered Guardianship and in the petition ask for the Judge to order the placement.