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She is 86 and may go in hospice. She is getting dementia.

You say "Parent has own POA". I assume that means that your parent is acting on her own behalf and has never APPOINTED another POA for her own affairs who is meant to act in her interest and in her stead if she is disabled. If you are saying she has a POA meaning she has already appointed a person to act as her POA, there is no way you can get that POA for yourself, assuming the person is not acting illegally or fraudulently. You say that she is "getting dementia". How bad the dementia is is the question here. A POA is a simple document (unless there is also a trust, which means you need both POA and a Trustee of Trust documents). This should be done BY A LAWYER who either very familiar with Trusts and their language or an elder care attorney. Do not attempt online things notarized. Banks and so on will use any excuse to block use of these things at whim and will. The real question here is does your parent want to confer power of attorney on you to act in her stead now, and when she is unable to act at all. She will be required by the lawyer to sign the documents, and she will have to show that lawyer that she has a full understanding of what she is doing, that is that she is giving over management of her legal financial affairs completely to you. IF she cannot understand this the lawyer will have to arrange meeting before a judge where you will apply as next of kin for legal guardianship and POA, Trust of whatever. This will be more costly. None of it is completely cheap. And do not take on this duty lightly. You are promising to act in your parent's stead to handle all financial issues. You will have to keep meticulous records; you cannot muddy waters by writing out checks without proof that they are written in your parent's interests for your parent's bills. Read up on acting as POA before asking for it to be conferred on you. It is sometimes easier to let a paid fiduciary to do this (and yes, that would cost still more).
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to AlvaDeer
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She has to assign you as POA. If she won’t then you have to pursue guardianship.
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Reply to worriedinCali
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