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Parent has a pelvic fracture after a fall this weekend. I knew this day would come because the nursing home staff was not listening when I would say parent is weak, unsteady, is losing weight, and on way too many meds. Oh no they said, parent is just being sneaky. Parent can do more than letting on – like walk although never seen.


So now, I’m concerned because the hospital says they can’t do rehab in the hospital because all the rehab days got used at the nursing home before becoming a permanent resident. I don’t know what to do because getting these medical affidavits for guardianship is hard. I don’t expect this nursing home to be able to keep our parent re-positioned to protect from bedsores now that healing has to take place rather than surgery.


Already on tons of meds and for every one they take off, another is added and now blood thinners. I wish my siblings would put our parent on hospice and allow home or hospice while in the nursing home. Honestly, parent is saying, "tired of all of this."


I’m not the one who signed parent into the nursing home so I’m told I can’t sign parent up for hospice let along anything else for that matter. I don’t know how to help remaining parent be comfortable in however many days left. I could go help more if parent was in a home setting or nursing home here rather than an hour away.


Please tell me something I can do! I swear this situation is causing me depression and didn't start with this parent.

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Sometimes there just aren’t good solutions, more like picking the best options among the sad choices left. A new fall/injury should trigger a new round of PT, often aimed at getting back to a already lowered baseline. With a long list of health issues it often becomes a merry go round of problems. Ask the hospital doctor to go over the meds with you, the purpose and importance of each. Ask the doctor about a hospice referral. As someone else has POA and control (I’m assuming from what you wrote) accept that the ultimate decisions aren’t on you. Don’t take this all on so much that you harm your own health, see your own doctor for the depression. Accepting that you can’t fix this is hard, but a gift that helps you. Wishing you both peace and calm
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Aswry, I'm so sorry.

As I recall, you are nit the chikd with POA or any standing to dobannything in this situatiom. I would advise you to visit and try to be accepting of the situation.

It seems like a "serenity prayer" type of situation to me.
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If you are not the one who signed the person into nursing home, then that person needs to take an action for hospice. There is little to rehab in a pelvic fracture. It is dreadfully painful and positioning is very painful. I honestly don't know what you can do. Not every situation has a fix it. I would discuss with the person in charge of the care now, request hospice and the mercy of pain medications. So sorry for what you are going through.
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BarbBrooklyn – not sure anyone has POA but don’t focus on that anymore. If I can get guardianship fine and if not fine (have made up my mind that at least I tried). But would love to have it if siblings don’t agree to hospice. Oh lol, do we visit at the nursing home but not like desired due to distance. My little family even got to help at some appointments recently. The last one we got to do it all and you should have seen the smile and heard the chatter. That’s how I know parent is all of those things mentioned. A fighter but a weak one. Mindset is great but body not agreeing.

Daughterof1930. I feel that the best option is hospice (always have) with or without nursing home but can’t get other siblings to agree. I will try to do the suggestion you provided (done many times), “to go over meds with the doctor and find out the importance of each and just see if the hospital will mention to other family hospice as extra set of eyes.” That way it will not be coming from my mouth.

Thanks AlvaDeer, waiting to see if parent get approved for another rehab option outside of the nursing home and then if not, will try to have the talk with my siblings. But not sure if this is best nursing home from what I have been seeing and not listening about being unsteady. I wish he were closer where my family could get at least a couple of visits from us a week instead of a couple times a month.

I have been reading, on this forum, to see if any stories of recovery show or even how some people managed care after a fall or break. I did read on here somewhere about a concave mattress
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Do you use the NH doctor or does Mom still have her PCP?

I would talk to the DON. I would ask her to have the doctor review parents medications. I find when there are hospital stays that meds are added on and not taken off after the problem is solved. I agree with you, a med could be the cause of her problem but talking to the staff does nothing. The DON or/a doctor. You can ask for a list of meds and take it to your pharmacist and ask what he thinks.

My Mom was in for a rapid heartbeat and found was caused by Graves Desease. She was put on meds to bring her heart rate down. Her specialist started her on Thyroid med that solved the heart rate problem but never, between two doctors, was the heart rate meds stopped until I questioned it. My DH was given BP meds by hospital, Moms increased both because of pain. No more pain when discharged and questioned why they had it. Mom couldn't get off the couch a visiting nurse said her B/P was too low because hospital had doubled the amt. Dr was surprised that DH was walking and took him off the BP.

Does your parent suffer from a heart problem, if not I would question the blood thinner. And if parent does need it, then she needs to be on a certain diet. There are foods, like green leafy vegetables, that interfer with the blood thinner. After a certain age Cholesterol medication does more harm than good. It effects the liver.
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I’ll get the help of a pharmacist at least for knowledge purposes. Haldol removed (yea). But still concerned about the 1,000 mg of Metformin (2 times a day) along with insulin. Now a med to prevent blood clots, synthroid, and still many others.

Synthroid is for his hypothyroidism. I thought hypothyroidism does the opposite (weight gain). Dad has weight loss. So confused on that prescription.
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My mom was losing weight. Her thyroid numbers were hypo. It was making her very week.

The weight loss was, in her case, from a totally different reason.
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