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For example, my elderly mother wants to pay me her daughter.

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If your mom is lucky enough to have her own money, she can pay you.
Have a lawyer draw up papers so that if she ever does have to go into a care facility they can't come back to you for the money she paid for your help. That money is not a gift and therefore is not treated as such. You will have to pay taxes, but it's worth it to know no one can come back years from now and want the money back.
This also enables your mother to give the money she has to you, her daughter, which is what most parents saved their whole lives in order to be able to do.
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Does your mom have long-term care insurance? Most policies will cover costs for care for dementia if a family member is hired by a home health agency. The home health agency will take a share of the hourly rate, but you will still average 10-13 dollars an hour depending on the agency. If your mom has this type of insurance, there will be a maximum amount she's been paying for monthly, and you just need to find an agency that will hire you to care for a family member. Good luck
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Is she on Medicaid? Medicaid will only pay licensed agencies that they have a state contract with. BUT sometimes the agency will hire you.
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