After years of pads and Depends for my mom, who is now 100 years of age, I have come up with an additional option: two pair of cotton underwear. My mom is not incontinent, but has frequency. The Depends and the pads both have drawbacks, as you all know. Both are expensive and chafe and are a disposal problem. The packaging itself is no fun either. The pads double over and stick to the skin, or are wrong sizes. I'm now using two pair of cotton underwear. The advantages are that it is airy, lightweight, easy to pull up and down, no packaging, washable, and no chafing. It provides just a bit of leak protection, perfect for someone like my mom who is not incontinent but has to "go" very often. And I suppose if someone were handy with a sewing machine, adding panels of folded cotton fabric or batting would work very well.
There are now these wonderful washable pants that are designed to hold fluid.
"Period pants" is what I see often on the shelves at the store. Washable panties that will hold fluid from bladder leaks or period flow.
These are probably a little less bulky than putting on 2 cotton underpants.
Or there are washable cotton pads that can be used just like the disposable pads that are sold.
You must save a ton of money too! My gosh, my mom spent a fortune on pads and then Depends.