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Papers are piling up the house is a total mess yet the husband refuses to think there is anything wrong with the wife in this situation. She appears to be in mid-stage dementia but the husband is in total denial and refuse to get her medical help or any other type of assistance. Family members have called in DHS for a home inspection which was of no value. they did a mandatory cursory quick home visit and a rubber stamp of approval which was totally wrong. Where do we turn to next to get the help we need. The home environment is a dangerous place and she must be gotten out of there.

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Even if you have to turn each stone upside down, it is imperative that professional help is called in. Look on google, ask the town hall, ask your doctor, ask the regional home nursing companies, and if necessary get the help of a bailif or a lawyer to get your mom out of this situation. If something shld happen one of these days without your having tried everything, you will feel guilty with yourself and angry with your dad for the rest of your days. No, something MUST change, not next week, but tomorrow. Do your parents have brothers / sisters ?? Do you have brothers and sisters ? Call in everybody and put things right. Strength and big hug
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As a caregiver for someone who is experiencing dementia, one of the things I've learned is that they need YOU to take action. First, find someone the husband trusts to talk to him about this and convince him that his wife needs care before something terrible happens, and this is more than he can provide. Also, get professionals to help - call the visiting nurse association and tell them the situation - they will help you get the services you need to help them both. I wish I could help you more, but if there's family to help, everyone should be alerted to it and involved in helping to find a solution.
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Family members can file for guardianship if they think she's incompetent.
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