My husband is 79 and lost his vision in 2000 to macular degeneration. Of course he is very dependent on me for everything. We have recently discovered that he is in the early stages of dementia. However, the things that he's been doing would lead me to believe it is progressing quickly. His children offer no support whatsoever. He is also a binge drinker. I also have an 87 year old mother who I have supported thru three episodes of breast cancer, numerous TIA's, massive stroke, and recently a broken arm and hip. She is in assisted living after being in/out of hospitals, nursing homes, and rehab. Since I'm an only child, she puts a lot of demands on me. After all the TIA's and major stroke, she too is showing memory loss. My weeks fill up fast. I'm always in the car going to doctors or running errands. I'm trying to find a support group in my area. I need SOMEONE to talk to. I am tired and my patience is running thin. It's becoming less and less frequently that I take time for myself. I'm burned out.
My goodness, you have a lot on your plate!
I have this theory of life about other people's needs.
I have to take care of my physical and mental self. If not me, who else will do that? If I'm not here, who is going to take care of the folks depending on me?
Next in line are minor children. Doesn't sound like you have any of those, and spouses are next.
Parents are last on the list, especially when they are in a care center.
Are you able to say "no" to your mom and cross some of her " you have to" errands off your list and have the facility take care of them?
When my mom was in IL, she liked to get her hair cut at an off premises place. She could have used the on site beauty parlor or taken the provided local bus. She didn't like to do that, but when I got hit by a car and had a concussion, or when my husband was ill, she did it.
This is a great place to vent and to get feedback. There are lots of amazing people and lots of funny, informative and thoughtful threads. Again, welcome. And do something for yourself today.