Follow
Share

I can't get her to do anything. My mother was with my sister in N.C for 8 mos. She will be with me now. All she does is sleep day and night. I can't get her to do anything. Is this normal? I am very worried and frustrated. I have trouble also getting her to eat. The Dr. say it is ok to let her sleep but I find it hard to believe as back in Oct she was not doing this. She has deteriorated since she has been with my sister in N.C. I just feel that all this sleep is not normal and there is something else that I could be doing to help her get past it. Please does anyone have suggetions?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
1 2 3 4
As people age, some sleep more and some sleep less. You mentioned her sleep patterns have changed since a year ago. is she exhibiting any other symptoms, like eating less, or signs of depression? Go back to your doctor and make sure he understands the Extent of your mom's sleep issues. Make it clear that she's not sleeping an extra few hours, but that its all day, every day. Also talk to him about any other symptoms she's having.
Helpful Answer (14)
Report

Did you mother go to NC after leaving her own home? If she did, and then she is going to be moving to your place, maybe she's having a hard time with the adjustments and with the upcoming move to your place? Might be good idea to check with your sister, which you probably have by now and see how she was acting/behaving there with her; then maybe check with your mom's doctor(s) to find out if there is any medical reason she's sleeping a lot more. I'm no expert, but I do have an 83 yr. old mother and I know she falls asleep a lot, but she also does not have many activities, no hobbies, really does not do a lot but only house hold activities like doing laundry, etc. I can see in my mother's case why she may retreat to sleep a lot, but it can be different for everyone and also medical reasons may be playing a big role. Wishing you and your mom all the very best !

Avie
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Same thing with my MIL, she would sleep all day and night if I did not wake her to drink and eat. She sleeps more at night now too...she use to get up like 5-8 times a night to pee, now she sleeps. One problem is a UTI and the antibiotic. Doctor says it is ok. She has moderate dementia too, so alot going on here..maybe your mom is having UTI? My MIL doctor does not seem too concerned given her age and moving here, plus the UTI...I dont feel good about it either, but apparently as long as we get them to drink and eat so that they do not dehydrate then apparently geriatric doctor here says ok. She is 88 yrs old and had bad fall 3 weeks ago also..alot, but I suppose even without all of that he was not real concerned due to age and the dementia???? Hope this helps, but I would still talk to your sis and the doctor just in case.
Helpful Answer (45)
Report

Has her doctor put her on an anti-depressant. My mother is on one and it has improved her eating. However, now as she begins her third year in a nursing home, her dementia continues to worsen and she is sleeping more and more. Her personality has become more withdrawn.
Helpful Answer (10)
Report

MOM:

Looks like a classic case of severe depression, but I'd also take a good look at all the medications she's taking. They might be knocking her out and rendering her too tired to have a bite.

DON'T let her waste away. She must be evaluated immediately. Good luck.

-- Ed
Helpful Answer (26)
Report

My mother is 94 years old and all she wants to do is sleep.I wake her up to eat,(she does eat one good meal a day and drinks ensure in the morning) she gets up to use the bathroom. I get her seated in her chair and she sleeps in it. I was told her little body is tired, let her sleep. Somedays we are talking 18 to 20 hours sleep. Is all this a normal process of a"tired little body"?
Helpful Answer (290)
Report

Just to relate my experience with my Dad, he used to sleep constantly and only got up occasionally to eat --- several years. He was on an anti-depressant and a counselor came to the house. After his hip surgery a few months ago, I realized I would need to hire a caregiver for my Dad in addition to the caregiver we already had who was taking care of Mom. Although our private caregiver was able to take care of both parents before surgery, Dad needed more care and attention post surgery.

Fortunately our caregiver's husband was available part time and had experience AND agreed to help out. That's when his behavior began to change. He would stay awake for longer and longer periods of time. I think it was because he had a companion and his companion initiated activities --- engaged Dad in things Dad liked to do. Dad likes crossword puzzles, trivia games, doing searches on the internet --- Google earth takes you anywhere you want to go and he especially likes to go to the town he grew up in -- looking at old pictures.

We're now on the 5th month that he has been waking up in the morning and staying awake until about 4pm when he takes a nap before dinner ... then stays up until bedtime.
Helpful Answer (24)
Report

Like Carol72156, I have found that initiating activities is something my Mama can no longer do for herself and that sleep is her way of reacting to the boredom that ensues if she has nothing to keep her interest. She has Alzheimers, which is the cause of all this. In any case, people need to be active, mind and body, or else they will waste away.
Helpful Answer (15)
Report

My 93 year old mother was at home this past spring,summer, and fall at her lake property. She did not get dressed, slept a lot, and was extra irritable.
When she came to spend the winter with us for the third year, she never dressed and spent most of her time in bed.
She just moved into an independent living facility with meals in the dining room. She dresses every day, showers with the help of an available CNA, and is visiting.Having new people to meet seems to help.
Helpful Answer (38)
Report

Hello there. Is your mom on any kind of antidepressant or do you think her meds might have anything to do with this? Also, it may be possible that she is in pain or feeling so bad or that she is sleeping to escape these problems that might be caused by old age. Do you think she may be depressed or frustrated because she is in pain or whatever her health problems are? Maybe you could find her some activities to do during the day (or night) like reading, crocheting or embroidery. Hope some of these suggestions help you and your mom. This community is very helpful and you are not alone. Please come back and let us know how things are going. :- )
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I am wondering if there is adult day care available for those with dementia and if it might help to solve the boredom/sleeping/depression problem??? My mother has a CNA for companionship 5 mornings a week, but he does little but watch TV. I found that this past weekend the inordinate time she spent sleeping just seemed to delay the normal (for her) outpouring of repetitive questions, negative comments like "I wish I'd just die," etc. It was as if all this was just stored up, and last night (Sunday), she awakened me at 10:30 p.m., accused me of taking her telephone, promising to call "the authorities" the first thing this morning. Having been lulled into a false sense of well being, I became so angry I couldn't calm down and lost a night's sleep. Sometimes I think that as caregivers, it is easier to just let the person we are caring for sleep, but there is a price to pay for it. My situation is complicated by the fact that my mother has always had narcissistic personality disorder so that when she lashes out, she knows exactly what buttons to press to upset me. My energy level is compromised by Multiple Sclerosis plus the fact that I am no kid either at 64 years of age. So, I am wondering if adult day care might be a way to go?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Adult Day Care is great because they get their clients involved in activities. My mother goes 3 times a week and she really does enjoy it. I bring her in in the morning and she is greeted by name, given attention, a lovely continental breakfast and she just blossoms. She does loathe the MyRide jitney bus ride home though because those vehicles really could use new shocks, I think. :)
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I cold have written any of these comments on Mother and her sleeping. I thought I was alone. What a big help. My mother came to live with me in Oct. and she participated in everything until Christmas. Now she sleeps all day and all night. I took her to the doctor and of course they don't have any answers. Put her on antibiotic for UTI? Does she have it or does she not. Also I have to take her for blood work. She eats, good and has gained 19 pounds since coming to live with me from independant living? I have tried everything, puzzles, books nothing keeps her awake. She is loosing her mind and the more she sleeps the farther away she becomes.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

Try seeing a naturopath. This might be something a naturopathic doctor would catch that an allopathic doctor would not.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Also, maybe something triggered depression around Christmas time? You might want to check that out through careful conversing.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I'm having the same problem with my Mom. I feel like she's dying of loneliness. She lives with me, but I work Mon thru Fri. My brother and sister live in the same community and they will not come to visit her or take her anywhere. What's worse, my sister lives a few blocks away from our house. Both my brother and sister work 12 hrs for 7 days, then they have 7 days off. Neither one is willing to stop by to spend time with Mom. My sister has 2 girls, whom my Mom hardly knows. I can't help but think that this is compounding my Mother's sleeping (and/or depression), and that what could be happening is she's dying from a broken heart. I have an appointment with a family care giver counsler next week, to help me form my words when I confront my siblings. Anybody out there with this problem? Anybody out there with any tips? Thank you in advance!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I hope the counselor can help you. This is a very sad situation. Please let us know how things go, at least. My thoughts are with you and your mother.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I have some good news, my brother emailed me, and they promise to come over more often once they buy a car. My brother and his other half just moved back home a little over 3 months ago. My brother has always loved mom. My sister however is totally ignoring my request for her and her family to visit mom. Her husband made a snide comment when they were here last, about Mom not being married. I guess they're still in the know it all stage. Anyway, thanks to this website, and you're feedback, I'm doing better! I'm going to take Mom to church tomorrow. I've joined a care giver support group and I hope I can form a mini group of other seniors who would like to get together on a regular basis, hopefully at my home or at a restaurant or something like that. It's really nice to know that I'm not alone in this situation, I'm sure glad I found this website. I love my Mom very much, and I'm going to let her know it.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My 95 year old Mom sleeps so deep, I can't wake her in time for church or anything else. She feels bad when she misses church and surprised when I tell her what time it is. I'm not sure if I should wake her by force or just let her sleep untill she wakes up. Some people say she will get gas from not eating all those hours. I haven't noticed and she is not depressed at all but her day is just so irregular because of her sleeping. Should I be worried?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My 78 year old Mom would rather sleep than do anythng else. She says she enjoys her dreams and is okay with sleeping 14 to 18 hours a day. Lately when she is awake she sits with her eyes closed or dozes off. She really can't go more than a couple of hours without laying down. I am very concerned and she has been to an assortment of doctors.Until 2009 she was one of the most active and busy people I knew. She was diagnoised with mild dementia and takes Aricept, otherwise she is very healthy. It's hard to watch such a vibrant active woman just stop living her life.

I do my best to keep her engaged in activities that she enjoys. When there is an event she wants to get up for such as church, doctors appt, bridge game, it's like pulling teeth to get her up and ready.

What else can I do? I'm afraid all this sleeping is going to lead to other health problems.
Helpful Answer (113)
Report

My Husband sleeps all night and most of all day. he can be sitting down at the dinner table and fall asleep he can be talking to someone and fall asleep. and scary yet he falls asleep driving. If I try and talk to him he yells at me. he also has diabetes 2 I am at my wits end. ,
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Sounds like narcolepsy - or however it's spelled. My father had this problem and also one of my professors at university. Except for the yelling. Neither my prof or my father yelled about it.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

my mom sleeps at least a good 22 hrs a day,or lets say she's in her bed. T.V. lights on,dogs barking greatgranddaughter playing (5 yrs old),so she's not quite,there's alot going on. She was on xanax and zoloft as of two weeks ago,but i asked the doctor does she really need them. So were slowly coming off of them. So much has changed, we can get her change diaper, take shower,go to kitchen but it's getting harder everywhere you put her she tries to fall asleep. She doesn't really talk anymore.she just has a blank stair. I ask her name my name,let her know what;s going on in the world everyday. She was doing most of this stuff when she was on those med's. And she still living in her house,I go there 2 or 3 times a day while my daughter and son in law are at work. All I know is i get her kiss me everyday and i kiss her. And I remember the nice life she gave me. All you can do is love them. Take Care.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Well my mom is 85 years old with no health issues, only a little arthtis in her knees. She is blind from glaucoma but has learned to live with it. She is always so energetic and healthy but for the past month she has stop eating and has lost a tone of weight. She told me that she was having a full feeling and asked me to get her some medicine to help work her stomach. She no longer feels full but she is still not eating and is sleeping all day. She will eat like one meal a day and not a full meal maby a pice of fruit and drink some insure. I told her that is not good but she says she is trying to see if her appitite will come back slowly. I have to put the food in front of her to make her eat something. I told her it is not normal but she says she is not sick does not feel weak and dizzy nothing. I cry every minute cause this is not my mom at all, she always eats a full plate of dinner and now nothing at all. I am worried and made her an appointmet to see the doctor just for my satisfaction and they can tell me she is ok. Please keep us in prayer.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I feel so good right now. My mom got up at her usual time this morning 4:00 am to do the dishes but I did them for her so she can just fix her food. She made herself some Top Ramen noodles and some coffee. It is making me smile just to know that she is eating.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My mom is 88 y.o, she has alz, kidney failure,macular degeneration, is deaf and broke her hip 3 years ago and now can't walk. She sleeps all night and has extreme nightmares, see's people, and screams to me. She eats at the most 1/4 cup of food a day and sleeps most of the time. There is nothing that we have found that she can or will do. She can't hear so it's hard to have a conversation with her, she can't see, so TV, reading knitting etc are out. Forgets things from one sec to the next. We try to take her out for walks in her wheelchair and she refuses to go. If we go anywhere and she goes with us all we here is I want ot go home. So most of the time my husband stays home when I go shopping and I stay home when he goes out. We never get to go out together. We have not been capable of getting any help from any orginazation. They all refuse to help us. But I'm worried about her not eating or drinking and sleeping so much.
Helpful Answer (32)
Report

My 84 year old father is unable to walk due to a hip problem that he has yet to see a doctor about. He is worried that a doctor may force the issue. He lives on his own in his house. He used to be constantly falling down. But that has stopped since he started using a walking stick. Dad also falls asleep a lot...and looks very pale & sick...but he is only talking some very mild blood pressure tablets...
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I am going though the same problem with my Pt, This is a lady who was always ready to go she is now 99 years old all she do is sleep all day and night she tell me and everyone to leave her alone she is ready to go nothing work she also do not eat if she do in the evening no breakfast no lunch just sleep all day all night.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My 89 yr old Mom is very w/ it. But falls asleep whenever she sits down, be it home, church, other's homes ; even on the toilet! sometimes she does not remember sleeping 3-4 hour stretches in her recliner
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Does excessive sleeping I mean all day and night mean the elderly are close to death? My mom is 93 and cannot longer speak due to many tias. She only takes 81mg of asprin daily. Her BP has been avg about 150/70. Its rather high but she weighs only 80 lbs and is 4'6". The dr.s do not want to give her any real means to lower it because when we really lowered it she was really nonresponsive. So we keep it alittle high. She has been more alert with this BP. However, She has a swallowing problem. We are feeding her only pureed foods but can hardly wake her up to eat or drink. Last week she had a choking episode and aspirated but recovered quickly but we called 911 as well. She has a DNR with no intubations, per her wishes. went in with a flight fever 101 given Tylenol supp. and fever went down. as given Levaquin just in case of pneumonia from aspiration but her chest films were all neg. Thank GOd. I am her daughter and I have POA. I hired a caregiver to help me because I get very nervous. I don't want to lose my mom. And I KNOW she wants to live. I won't give up on her. The caregiver said if God wanted her it would have happen last week.. My mom would be alert for about 2 days in a row. then sleep deep the next day then the next day up and down with the sleep until the third day fully awake. It's like she recharges herself which I understood she's 93. She used to walk with me and the caretaker arm to arm but now I see she is getting weaker because she is not eating well anymore. So some questions to see is anyone can share their secrets on the following....
why do the elderly sleep all the time?
How to stimulate swallowing?
what are some food ways to get liquids down her to prevent dehydration
why would her BP be going up?
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

1 2 3 4
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter