Can a power of attorney that is not family keep me and my mom from seeing our adoptive Grandma in a nursing home?

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We have just been banned. The power of attorney whose husband is a doctor has accused us of taking money over the years from my adoptive Grandma and says she is agitated after we visit her, neither is true. She is happy when we leave. The administrator at the nursing home has harassed, threatened, and tried to intimidate us on and off since March of 2015. We have contacted State on aging and Ombudsmen, they will do nothing. They have restricted my Grandma from seeing us in the courtyard and her bedroom on occasion to only the common room to keep an eye on us. My Grandma's wishes is to see us throughout the property and she never understands when they would force us and her down to the common area. My Grandma has mild Alzheirmer's. Today my mom was told we can no longer see her. Can they do this?

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GrandmaJoyce, are you still visiting your dear family friend in the common rooms, as allowed?
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Grandma, unless you can prove that thefts occurred via use of a private detective or with documentation that you probably have no access to as non-POA, yes you are stuck. The fact that APS unfounded the complaints against you is helpful but does not necessarily directly translate into evidence you could use if you take the matter to court.
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Basically, you have no rights in this matter. You are not family. You are not legal guardians, you are not designated to have any involvement in this.

Accept what those who do have these legal rights have allowed you, Actually, you have no choice,
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Churchmouse, Yes, we find it unbelievable that a nun would do this but we believe she was the one taking from my Grandma because money would come up missing and some of her medication. It's not surprising, I've been mistreated by many more people in the church that said they were Christians than non-Christians. Hard and terrible to say this, that this would be the case, me being a Christian myself. I've called the police, there was no reports, only investigations by Adult Protective Service a couple of times, that the nun called them on us. They investigated and found nothing, they never even talked to me or my mom. I called them to find out what was going on. The whole system is corrupt. It seems people can say false allegations, do whatever they want and you're helpless to defend yourself. The state agency even sides with the POA thinking we are trouble makers now just because we were trying to figure out what was going on and trying to protect my Grandma's rights. We've done everything we can. Even if we had the money to sue how could we ever prove defamation of Character or slander. My mom confronted the Nursing home Administrator the day she was told she could no longer visit and the Administrator denied the things she did to harass us at the Nursing home in front of one of the nurses aides. The whole thing is absurd. Well, the thing we know and hold onto is that God knows the truth and he will take care of it, rather in this life or the next they will have to answer for what they have done to not honor my Grandma's wishes and wants and for how they have done us but we forgive them and pray for God's mercy. Thank you.
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Dear Churchmouse. Yes you are not only old fashioned but also pretty darn naive regarding the integrity of nuns. We don't know the truth of all of this of course and it would likely be impossible to determine which is a big part of the problem for all concerned. But never, never ascribe some sort of divinity to nuns or even clergymen. Thanks.
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As an Ombudsman, I would represent grandma's wishes; the only way I must refuse to help is if there is a court ordered POA or Guardian in place for the patient. So I am guessing this already went to court.
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POA doesnt give that person the power to do that . I just talked to an attorney.You can file for guardianship.Some family members can contest it
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Granted that it is very difficult to prove a negative, to prove that you and your mother did not take money from this lady, you and your mother have been outright accused of theft, have you?

That's a very serious allegation. Would you be in a position to demand that those making it either publicly retract the allegation or prove it?

The thing is, if a nun isn't a pillar of a community then I don't know who would be; so it is not that surprising that the other authority figures in the case - the doctor, the home administrator, the old lady's POA - are inclined to believe what she says. They don't have to be kin, or in cahoots in some sinister way. Wouldn't you take a nun's word for something unless you had good reason not to?

I may be very old-fashioned but I do find it hard to believe that a nun would slander you purely out of jealousy of your friendship. Where else might she have got the idea that you and your mother were taking financial advantage of your friend?

What it comes down to is that you will either have to take formal steps to clear your name - you could sue for defamation, you could go to the police and tell them that this accusation has been made and you wish them to follow it up - or you will have to suck it up.

I do find it distasteful and unfair that these people are taking the moral high ground in one way, by barring you from further contact, but then confining themselves to gossiping about you rather than treating the matter as seriously as perhaps they should. It prevents you from having any way of defending your reputation, which is not right.
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Best you stay away or land in court. I take it she lived with you but you cannot account for her funds. We always tell people to keep funds separate and keep all receipts to avoid accusations.
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Thanks everyone for all the answers. No we didn't adopt each other legally, just symbolically. We used to take care of her. She is like family. The POA is a long time friend of her and we knew her as well, never thought she would do this, keep us from seeing her. We all trusted her, that is why my Grandma gave her POA on the note that she would be able to see us and go out with us. We don't understand all this, it makes no sense. She has no money that we know of. We are not allowed to see her anymore according to the POA and the Administrator. We didn't care to see her in her room but sometimes she would be tired laying down and wanted to see us there. We didn't like that she would be forced out of the room just to see us and she wanted to visit us in the courtyard which has a high fence and we sat right by the door, but that was stopped as well. We felt her visiting rights were being violated and that is why we contacted the state of Texas and the Ombudsmen. They will do nothing to help us rectify the situation. They all believe the POA and Administrator that we took money from her before going into the nursing home. This was alleged by a nun, that we believe was jealous of our relationship with her that use to live in her apartment building. No validity to it at all. We believe they are all friends, for the nun is patient to the POA's husband, which is a doctor. For the last 1 year and a half we have asked the POA when we saw her and she always told us she wasn't doing this. Her husband was having her apparently do it. For he has accused me and my mom on the phone of the allegations. The administrator also has the same last name of the husband. We believe they are related. It's a very hurtful and crazy thing for we just love her and want what's best for her. We are now doing the only thing we can which is to pray for my Grandma. Thank you
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