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My wife who I've cared for a long time, was put in a care home without me being told. She had been in hospital for some time, even my own son did not tell me. She's not happy at all. Is this the way old people are treated? Like this?You work all your life, pay into the government, the powers who think they know best are not always right, they have got to get old one day, I've no faith anymore.

Alan - I am sorry you're missing your wife. It must be very hard for you to be without her.

Can you tell us why your wife needed you to care for her? And why was she in the hospital? How old is she? How old are you? Sorry for all the questions. But knowing what kind of care your wife needs is important.

If her needs at this point exceed what you can provide, then it is not safe for her to be at home. For example, if she's immobile and needs to be lifted to go to the bathroom, you, being elderly, won't be able to help her. You both could get seriously hurt.

Have you gone to visit your wife? I'm sure she would be happy to see you.
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Reply to polarbear
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Alan. My father would not put my mother in permanent care even though she was long overdue to be in one
i had to be the one to do it. Trying to continue alone at home was literally killing him. You think your son does not care but maybe he sees the toll it is having on you
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Reply to PandabearAUS
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Thanks,yes just about,i have kids thet do not seem to care,alan
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Reply to alan0000
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So sorry Alan, what probably happened hospital suggested this, son agreed, doctor wrote orders for transfer. Her attending physician may be the same one who is the one at the facility she is in.
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Reply to shad250
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Alan I'm sorry for what you're going through.

How are you? Are you looking after yourself?
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Reply to Countrymouse
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