Caregiving is extremely hard. But nursing homes are hard also. I have yet to learn of one that provided adequate care and I live in a very large city.
Most are warehouses - they do not provide real care. You switch home care for constant advocating with people who will lie to you and seek retribution if you complain.
If you are already stressed at home, you can also look in to getting home health care.
There is no easy way through caring for someone aging and ill. I wish our country provided more assistance but they do not.
Thank you all for your kind advice. I admire your honesty and thank you all for taking the time respond. I’m blessed to have found you all and this wonderful forum.❤️
Caregiving is the hardest job a person will ever do, hands down. I'm not sure the reasoning behind agreeing to let your mom move in with you, especially with all of her issues and yours as well. Since you're early in this, you may want to consider finding mom the appropriate facility for her to move to, so she can get the 24/7 care she needs and you can quit jeopardizing your own health because of her. Your mom would never want you to do that. And you know that things with her will only continue to get worse(it will never be better)and if you're already stressed after only a month, that should tell you that things MUST change and you have to now do what not only is best for your mom, but for you as well. You can still be moms advocate after she's placed, and it will be a whole lot less stress on you. I pray for wisdom and discernment for you as you go forward.
I will be honest here, a disabled person should not be doing caregiving. Its hard at 60+ to care for someone if you have no disabilities. I have friends who were CNAs and retired at 60 because it was just too much.
You are dealing with someone with a Dementia which is too unpredictable. They can no longer reason, comprehend or process. TV and dreams become part of their reality. They are up wandering around in the middle of the night. If Mom has money, place her in a nice AL. If not, have her evaluated for 24/7 care in a Longterm care facility and apply for Medicaid. This desease only worsens. My Mom could no longer bathe herself and needed help dressing and toileting. I prayed everyday please no #2 today.
Most are warehouses - they do not provide real care. You switch home care for constant advocating with people who will lie to you and seek retribution if you complain.
If you are already stressed at home, you can also look in to getting home health care.
There is no easy way through caring for someone aging and ill. I wish our country provided more assistance but they do not.
Since you're early in this, you may want to consider finding mom the appropriate facility for her to move to, so she can get the 24/7 care she needs and you can quit jeopardizing your own health because of her. Your mom would never want you to do that. And you know that things with her will only continue to get worse(it will never be better)and if you're already stressed after only a month, that should tell you that things MUST change and you have to now do what not only is best for your mom, but for you as well.
You can still be moms advocate after she's placed, and it will be a whole lot less stress on you.
I pray for wisdom and discernment for you as you go forward.
You are dealing with someone with a Dementia which is too unpredictable. They can no longer reason, comprehend or process. TV and dreams become part of their reality. They are up wandering around in the middle of the night. If Mom has money, place her in a nice AL. If not, have her evaluated for 24/7 care in a Longterm care facility and apply for Medicaid. This desease only worsens. My Mom could no longer bathe herself and needed help dressing and toileting. I prayed everyday please no #2 today.
it seems living happily with one’s elderly parents is quite rare. maybe it’s rare to have sweet, older parents.
in particular, mothers are often terrible with their daughters.
hire people if you can.
hugs!!
hope you’re ok.
remember, that loving parents want you to live your life, blossom, thrive, succeed.
bundle