New to Forum. Need Advice on Next Steps.

As a guardian/conservator, I can tell you that if she has not been officially diagnosed as having dementia yet, try to get that POA (and separately, get her bank's official POA form signed, too). I know that's really difficult when you're talking about a senior with serious delusions and paranoia. My mother is a LOT like yours, between the personality and the mental illness. But try, because conservatorship takes months to go through the courts. It's a real slog, and costs thousands in legal fees. And there's a lot more oversight, a lot more rules as to what you can and can't do. Many things you would be able to just do as POA (such as moving Mom from a skilled nursing home/rehab to assisted living) will need court permission, and it can take weeks for that permission to come through.

The first year is tough. It does get easier as certain tasks get put to bed and other tasks go on autopilot. It's a new reality, indeed, but it doesn't have to mean an end to life as you know it. It's just tough for a while. I wish you and your brother luck.

Thank you so much for the helpful responses.

My mother is very headstrong, independent, and determined. She will not respond lightly to someone making decisions on her behalf. She is less likely to be honest and open with me for fear of being judged. Me being the oldest of three may have something to do with it. My sister, the middle child, pasted away from illness almost 9 years ago.

My brother and I are planning to connect with my Mother's doctor. The doctor is already aware of some issues.

She has called the police a couple of times on the lazer-armed neighbor claiming they were going to kill her. We'll look into getting the police reports to see if they indicate a person in mental distress.

This condition has only been evident within the past year - year and a half. Other than this paranoid psychosis, she is quite sharp. Of course there are the forgetful moments of "I can't think of the right word" events most of us over 50/60 experience.

The UTI suggestion is something I will definitely inquire about. It was something depicted in a recent TV show. If I recall my mother is prone to have UTIs. In addition, she is already on the brain-booster supplements you guys mentioned.

I'll post back as things progress.

Welcome, Joe. This is a new diagnosis with no prior history? This may not necessarily be dementia related to age, if there have not been some signs in the past. You need first of all a diagnosis. If Mom is not cooperative you are correct that you need at least temporary guardianship to start.
Does someone live in the area? I understand you do not.
I grew up in the Ozarks. Welcome to the Forum. Keep us posted.

Your Mom needs a full physical. This could be a UTI and if so she needs antibiotics or she will become septic. A culture needs to be done to determine what type of bacteria is causing the problem. Labs will show if anything physical is causing her problem. Dehydration, low potassium, Thyroid, B12 can give a person Dementia type symptoms. An MRI will show any Dementia. Once that is confirm, she then needs a Neurologist.

Locate your mother's county/regional department on aging. A great place to start for lots of information, programs, and support.

Welcome, Joe!

The first thing you should know is that Urinary Tract Infections in elders can cause psychiatric symptoms.

The second thing you should know is that a sudden change in mental status is a medical emergency and warrants a call to 911 if the person may be at risk for harmful behavior. EMTs are generally well trained in dealing with this.

Have you or your brother had a conversation with mom's physician about this?

Welcome OzarkJoe.
Sorry to hear your troubles with your Mother.

Reaching out to people, for professional advice, practical help or just a social chat is a very good start.

If she is in immediate danger, professional immediate help will be needed (calling EMS for pysch eval).

If less immediate but of high concern, a thorough medical checkup is sensible. That may depend on her temperament (meek as a mouse, stubborn as a mule, or mad as a cut snake?) & how persuasive your boots-on-the-ground brother is to get her to her Doctor's.