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We finally have the referral for the neurological evaluation for MIL. But now I'm starting to wonder . . . . . most of what I read about this test makes me think it's primarily about her memory. Our concern is more about her competency (paying bills, allowing someone to scam her, not putting spoiled milk on her cereal and eating it, etc.)


Does anyone have any insight to share about whether the testing will address this? I'm afraid if it's just memory, she might actually pass by the skin of her teeth (and sleep for two days after the mental exhaustion of doing so! LOL)

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Thank you all for your answers. I'm feeling better and a little hopeful about the outcome of this.

At this time, her daughter has POA, and has begun paying bills when MIL refuses (doesn't believe she owes it, loses the bill, or whatever), monitoring her bank account online, setting most bills to online/auto pay and getting herself added to accounts and services that MIL has -- setting things in place, preparing for when she has to completely take over.

MIL executed the POA 15 or more years ago, and it was the type that takes effect once it is signed, so Sis in Law is all good and legal here.

Alvadear - that is part of our dilemma, MIL does NOT wish to have any help with anything. Insists she is fine and handling everything "Just fine on my own" -- she is not.

Though MIL executed the POA, she doesn't really understand it - what she describes as POA is actually the job of Executor of a will. So the fact that her Daughter is stepping in and doing things infuriates her and she keeps saying that no one has any right to do anything until she's dead, then the Daughter and Son (my hubby) together can make decisions and write checks, etc. (which is correct, she has appointed them co-executors).

The funny thing is, when I had a lawyer look over the POA and other docs, he was really amazed at the broad power it granted - it was one of those that included everything and the kitchen sink! She really gave Daughter the keys to the kingdom -- lucky for us, Daughter is honest and straightforward, and will honestly try to do the best she can for her mom.
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The cognition tests that are administered test executive brain function. The executive brain is the conductor of the orchestra. If the conductor is missing, the band is all over the place, confused and not knowing what to do. So, will the test address issues besides memory? The answer is Yes. If your MILs executive brain function is compromised, THAT is why she's putting spoiled milk on her cereal, etc. Memory is indeed one part of the testing criteria, but not all of it. Once the entire test is completed, the doctor has a better feel for a person's general mental performance abilities.

Best of luck!
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You will be advised about her overall competency. I am assuming you are going to be POA if needed. You need to know if she is A) competent to assign you and B) if you wish to be assigned this onerous duty. The tests are more than you will imagine and if you are health care proxy they will be discussed with you. Important that you tell the doctor her family needs to know how to proceed ongoing now in helping her with bills and etc. Does your mother WISH TO have someone help her with her bills, and does she wish to assign a POA?
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A comprehensive test should take all that into consideration.
I was at a seminar and heard a Neuropsychologist speak and it seems that the work up he does includes all that. So if you are seeing "just" a neurologist you might want to ask if they work with a Neuropsychologist
In any case please express your concerns when you talk to the doctor.
But..one of the things you mentioned are not all problems that someone with dementia faces.
Allowing someone to scam her..that happens every day to people that do not have dementia
Paying bills can be confusing for lots of people. You might want to start now and set up direct payments or if you can manage many of her bills on line that might help out.
I also strongly suggest that you set up an appointment with an Elder Care Attorney and put things in motion for POA for finances, health, have a Will drawn up as well as establishing Trusts if that is appropriate.
Once she actually receives a diagnosis of "dementia" it is possible that her necessary signatures might not be possible.
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