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There is someone there who has alterior motives to gain control of the finances. I am needing to replace her. My father had asked me daily to come down in november/december time frame. Was even suggesting he'd put me name on his house. I refused because he was still drinking himself to death. Bad decision. Now my evil sister is there like a circling vulture. I believe that I am the named trustee to the state. My father has been in and out of the ICU so many times since his liver shut down 20 some years ago. the last two times have been in the past 2 months aproximately. I need to move down there and take control of the dier situation. My step mom has maybe weeks left to live. I am who they both counted over the years, because out of 7 kids, I was the only to step up and help. To a point where I picked up, took my dogs, and headed there in 2014 (1000 miles away) at her request, as dad had once again left her alone with multiple strokes, because he drank himself into the hospital again. THIS IS URGENT! The sister has been there a few weeks, said dad offered her the house to come down. She took it and ran with it!!!!!! She was and had been homeless for many years. And after 7 or 8 DUI's she could even legally drive. That is just what my dad needs in his current condition where I've been told he cannot even complete full easy statements because of his condition. Please help! Unfortunately, I went though several jobs at the age 60, because partitially due to painful situations over years, where I had to become my Grandson't Foster Care Parent.

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You refused to go there in November/December of last year because your father is still drinking heavily and the situation is beyond your, or anybody else's, control.

You add: "bad decision."

I have to disagree. I think that decision was absolutely right. I think you should stick to it like glue. You did your best three years ago. You're done. Whatever happens next is not your fault - don't let it become your problem either.
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If you need financial assistance, why can't your older brother who is "chief of staff and a 30+ year internal medicine specialist out of Georgia" give you money? And if he stated that your father is incapable of caring for his wife, why doesn't HE do something? Sounds like he has distanced himself from it all...perhaps for good reason?
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Sorry for your situation. Can you be more specific about what kind of help your are looking for?
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I need financial assistance to get my sister out and me in. She can't even drive to the grocery store legally. Never taken care of anyone not even her kids. I need to step in now. I live in Kansas City, my father is in Niceville Fl.
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When your Dad asked you back in NOV. to come, and you couldn't...you needed to get a DPOA in your name. Right now, ask your Dad did he give your sister the DPOA on paper. If not, file for it immediately. You'll need to either get there and do it directly through a notary or call a lawyer over the phone and ask what you need to have it. Explain the situation to them. Even if he has given it to her, if he signs off on a new one for you, she is no longer POA, you are. Unfortunately, if he signed the deed of the house over to her or put it in her name only, you will have a harder time shifting that bag of bricks. All is not lost though...just get on the phone and make your plans and then when you get there, prepare to do battle with your sister, because if she has inserted herself into his finances, he is likely going to be harder to deal with. BTW, is your Mom on hospice? I have found that speaking directly with hospice case workers to be invaluable in so far as resources go. They try to be helpful in family situations. Explain to them the situation with your Fathers drinking, your sisters manipulation etc., and see if they can put you in touch with some good resources in the area. I really wish you well - I've been through some of this with a manipulative and narcissistic cousin who put his name down on everything although the house was simply left as an asset on the will that would be equally split among the beneficiaries. But I had to get his name off their accounts and deal with the fact that he had stolen money from them in the thousands and then accused me of doing it and all manners of horrible accusations. The stress was unbelievable. Good luck.
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He is incapable of making decisions. Recently while my sister was there, my dieing step-mother fell out of bed. My dad somehow picked her up and put her back in bed. Then according to my neice who's just moved down there as well, there was blood everywhere where she fell. I am sure my sister had to have driven them to "3 urgent care facilities, where my dad was kicked out" and she was refused help.

My older brother is chief of staff and a 30+ year internal medicine specialist out of Georgia. He heard of the incident and said my father is incapable of taking care of his wife. And the sister now living there, is completely untrustworthy. "Does not believe anything that comes out of that sister's mouth" --- March 21st, 2017
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Yes my step mom is in hospice. 3 stokes minimum and rare disease gives her only weeks maybe.
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Once she's/their gone, he's at the other sisters mercy. I'm thinking she may try to get his signature now that he's not near as alert. I need to stop her. She will try!
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If your father is incapable of making decisions, you will not be able to get a DPOA. I think CM is correct. You can't control/change things. Let the chips fall where they may. Sorry for your difficulties.
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CTTN55, that sounds reasonable. KDC I would start by asking your brother. He is in Georgia, not too far from Florida. I would bet with a few phone calls from him, he'd be able to gather information more quickly as he should be on the HIPPA list to allow him to get info. Can you stay with your niece who just moved there? I would go to your family first.
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