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It is recommended to find a Geriatric Psychiatrist for behavioral outburst. He is also suffering from a lack of insight & believes false memories or mixes them up. He is very intelligent but the short term memory is getting worse also. At times the behavior goes to a rage & I feel unsafe more & more. I need to use a walker & have physically declined.


Does anyone know of a Geriatric Psychiatrist? Or other doctor who can help with behavioral & also a big word: anosognosia?

Ask his primary care doctors for a referral to a geriatric psychiatrist.
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Reply to Bridger46164
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Imho, please do not hesitate to call 9-1-1 when he flies into a rage. It is IMPERATIVE that you protect yourself.
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Reply to Llamalover47
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Sounds like a plan and of course you need to find someone in your community not ours....I would ask your regular MD for a referral. There also may be a medical society in your town, and actually, first I might call your local Alzheimer's Assn or attend a support group of theirs if there is one as others may have needed the same. IF you fear for your safety, don't hesitate to call 911. In fact, you may want to call your local city police and or fire to let them know the circumstances so they can be aware if called. I'm sure they will ask if there are any weapons in the home and hopefully that is not the case?
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Reply to gdaughter
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Check with the local hospital. They should have a Board Certified Geriatric Psychiatrist on their staff. Also, Geriatric specialist might be helpful. You could ask your local library to find one also.
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Reply to Moxies
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If you feel in danger when he goes into a rage, please call 911 and tell them that he has these issues, is in a rage and he is a danger to you.

They will respond and they will take him to a psychiatric hospital. This will get the wheels rolling to get you some help.

You have to be brave enough to tell the police what is really going on. They don't want to hurt him, they will not take him to jail, they will take him for medical treatment. But know going into this that it will be super intense and scary as all get out but, it will get the help you both need.

Tell the hospital that he is no longer safe at home and that you can not care for him. No matter what they say to you, you stick to your guns because they will tell you anything to get you to take him home. Learn to say, "He is not safe at home, I can not care for him safely." No explanation, no justification, he is not safe at home and you can not care for him. Say this every single time somebody tries to get you to take him home. They will eventually get it but, you can not waiver for one second.

Remember when you are feeling guilty about placing him that you matter as much as he does and you do not deserve to live in fear and danger because he is sick. It's not him, it's his broken brain that will never get better and it can't be fixed. You matter and deserve to be safe.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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psuskind1 Mar 8, 2021
This is excellent advice regarding telling police etc. of this sad dangerous situation.
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My 98 year old Mom has dementia. She is followed by a neurologist and palliative doctor for behavioral issues, sleeping patterns, psychosis and pain.

Physical pain, emotional pain (loosing control and loosing partners looms large with the elderly.) Medication to help stabilize my Mom’s life has made a huge difference.
she is on Zoloft for depression..... fewer mood swings.
She’s on a small dose of remeron to help her sleep.
Her recent episodes of psychosis is being treated as well.
She has 24/7 home care. We are trying to create a safe, comfortable, joyful environment. Pain medicine as needed.

Try to find a neurologist that specializes with elderly issues.
It’s been a life line for us.
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Reply to Lee10075
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Anosognosia is a big ol' Greek word that means a person who does not believe/recognize his/her own problems. This is usually the case with somebody with dementia.

If the man who lives with you (husband?) has violent outbursts and you are concerned about your safety, please contact the local authorities. They can take this fellow to a hospital that has an inpatient psychiatric unit. He will remain there for evaluation and treatment. When his behavior has been modified, you can talk with social worker about next steps. He is more likely to be evaluated and treated by a psychiatrist that specializes in geriatrics.

Since you need to use a walker and have physical issues, may I suggest you talk to a social worker about placement for your guy in a memory care unit that also has assisted living accommodations for yourself. That way you can get help that you need while also making sure his needs are addressed.
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Reply to Taarna
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caroli1 Mar 8, 2021
Tamara, I agree with your main suggestion. However, for now, the O.P. does not belong in assisted living. Using a walker and having mobility issues is not enough to necessitate assisted living; the O.P. indicates she is independent. Many years ago, many independent living communities would not allow anyone who used a walker to enter the community. (Some allowed you to remain if you later need a walker.) In my experience, someone who has physical issues and uses a walker but is caring for herself independently would not be happy in AL. I have 2 friends who did not need AL but their husbands did. In both cases, the friends were unable to stick it out in AL and had to make separate arrangements for themselves. Th eO.P., if she wishes to remain in close proximity to her husband, should find a community with a continuum of care so that for now, she can live in independent living while her husbands is in memory care.
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Call your local NAMI office for support and recommendations. If this is truly a mental health issue, they are the best people to help you.
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Reply to LakeErie
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Have you considered trying a neurologist instead?
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Reply to TheWife
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You shouldn’t feel unsafe in your home. Please reach out to your husband’s doctor and describe what you’re experiencing. Ask for a geriatric psych consultation. Tell the doctor specifically about the rage that scares you. Anytime it gets out of control call 911 immediately. Hopefully there will be meds to help him be calm, but please don’t stay in a scary situation. It’s okay to make changes in living arrangements when it becomes too hard, it’ll keep you both safe. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this and wish you peace in your home
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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I think a person who deals with geriatric issues is positive. You may not initially have to jump to a psychiatrist. My husband found one for his late mother. She could refer him to doctors specializing in this area. She had so much helpful information to provide. Psychiatrists tend to deal more specifically with medication which may be needed but a doctor can prescribe that. There are so many areas to deal with depending on the issues with that person in your life. A psychiatrist may not be able to legally provide you with suggestions that you could benefit from. I hope you can find a way to source this need.
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Reply to Riverdale
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This forum is for people from all over so it isn't likely that anyone can recommend someone in your specific area, if your doctor can't help then perhaps your nearest agency on aging will have a list of providers?
And if you are interested AgingCare has some good articles about anosognosia, I'll link one

https://www.agingcare.com/Articles/anosognosia-dementia-patients-cant-recognize-impairment-210090.htm
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Reply to cwillie
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If you yourself have a doctor whom you trust, you may get suggestions for what you need for a referral for your husband from that person.

A trained psychologist or neurologist can do the kind of assessment your husband needs too, as long as they have extensive training in dealing with cognitive, emotional and/or behavioral disorders in the elderly.

Also Google “Geriatric Assessment” and see if there are any geriatric medical practices near you. Perhaps you could encourage your husband to have a “physical”.

You are on the right track, and hopefully you will be able to connect with someone who can help your husband AND YOU.

In the meantime, stay safe and be extra good to yourself. Keep in touch with friends, you need encouragement and support as you seek the help you and your husband need.
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Reply to AnnReid
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