So she raised me with invalidation and hate and made my dad and I hate each other etc. etc.
Now she's got dementia and congestive heart failure and copd, had the bag thing but doesn't anymore, needs oxygen and can't walk really on her own, (except recently when she came home from very short visit to hospital, where she walked across the room on her own). Ever since then it's impossible to keep her in bed; you turn your back for a second and she's getting up going who knows where. The caregivers she hired are no help. They clean the house while she sleeps and she can tell them what a great job they did, when I'm the one who already cleaned the house. She has sundowning and is crazy from midnight to sunrise. The hate she feels for me just pours out of her and she yells for me and at me all night long. I just can't stand there and be patient, like she needs. All I can do is check on her and urge her to stay in bed, otherwise I can feel mean getting ready to come out of me. She's currently in a nursing facility but I'm having to fight kaiser to keep her somewhere and to understand that its not good for her to come home and she just can't again. Anyone know where or what you call for help? Working on Medicaid and Medicare for housing costs but that can take a while even with special help. I think her housing runs out on Friday and I'm scared. They keep trying to deliver another bed. Everyone else sees such a sweet woman, they don't see the mean.