Definitely submit the DL to the DMV with a letter from Doctor. Many doctors will do this themselves. There would be then a letter of revocation of license. I think if Dad has bad dementia it is time to remove car and keys from any access he may have to either as well. If there is a lot of anger, grief, fighting, just remember that this is truly real grief. This is loss after loss after loss, and the loss of our own ability to make our own decisions is a loss of our very selves. It is worth raging and grief. I am so sorry. I wish you so much luck. Our elders very a lot in this situation and the ability to adapt is as individual as our thumbprints. My brother surprised me by adapted well to ALF. He said "You know, it's a bit like being in the army. I didn't like it, but I made the best of it."
Go through his doctor and the transportation dept. will revoke his ability to legally drive. I also believe that less information for seniors id the Best
McGray, I read your profile and your Dad is only 76 years old. So sorry he is going through that at such a young age with the Alzheimer's/Dementia.
Regarding the driver's license, can you ask the DMV to give Dad a written test, eye test, and maybe [or not] a driving test? If the DMV finds that your Dad fails, then they will be the bad guys, not you or your sister.
As for moving Dad into Assisted Living, can he budget for the money rent? Rent varies from area to area. My Dad was paying $5k per month for Independent Living, and later paying $7k per month for Assisted Living/Memory Care.
Moving my Dad was easy, he wanted to get out of his house and he knew he was becoming too elderly to keep up the maintenance. The rent included weekly housekeeping, weekly linen service, and meals in a restaurant menu dining room. For Assisted Living, housekeeping and linen service were daily.
Would your Dad be willing to move? One needs to remember, some elders believe that "nursing homes" are what they were back in the early 1900's, county asylums. Not a place you would wish to place a love one. Take Dad to visit some of the senior living facilities once the covid-19 is a memory. Some places even offer a free lunch so Dad can sample their food. Places are more like hotels today :)
Also, your profile says your dad is only 76 and you are out of state, trying to transition him to a care community. Are you or your siblings PoA for him? Are you considering a living arrangement close to one of you? Thanks for more info.
I also believe that less information for seniors id the Best
http://www.alzheimersweekly.com/2017/03/how-to-stop-alzheimers-drivers.html
Regarding the driver's license, can you ask the DMV to give Dad a written test, eye test, and maybe [or not] a driving test? If the DMV finds that your Dad fails, then they will be the bad guys, not you or your sister.
As for moving Dad into Assisted Living, can he budget for the money rent? Rent varies from area to area. My Dad was paying $5k per month for Independent Living, and later paying $7k per month for Assisted Living/Memory Care.
Moving my Dad was easy, he wanted to get out of his house and he knew he was becoming too elderly to keep up the maintenance. The rent included weekly housekeeping, weekly linen service, and meals in a restaurant menu dining room. For Assisted Living, housekeeping and linen service were daily.
Would your Dad be willing to move? One needs to remember, some elders believe that "nursing homes" are what they were back in the early 1900's, county asylums. Not a place you would wish to place a love one. Take Dad to visit some of the senior living facilities once the covid-19 is a memory. Some places even offer a free lunch so Dad can sample their food. Places are more like hotels today :)
https://www.agingcare.com/topics/44/driving
And here are questions and answers posted by individuals.
https://www.agingcare.com/topics/44/driving/questions
You are not alone!
Also, your profile says your dad is only 76 and you are out of state, trying to transition him to a care community. Are you or your siblings PoA for him? Are you considering a living arrangement close to one of you? Thanks for more info.