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My dad’s retirement is too much to qualify for Medicaid assistance for nursing home care; but not enough to pay for them both (neither in good health; will both qualify for Veterans Home, but that cost is beyond their retirement by $3k a month). Will the Veterans Home be able to force my sister and I to pay the balance because my parents put our names on their accounts? I don’t want to have to give up my own retirement to pay for this. Of course we would sell their assets for their care—but can they come after my own assets if they are not in my parents’ names?

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Talk to an elder care attorney. You can set up a Miller's Trust and apply for Medicaid if necessary. You are not responsible for the balance. If the Veterans Home has a social worker they may be able to guide you through the process of a Millers Trust and Medicaid.
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I am on my moms accounts so that I can write checks for her. And things will be easier when she passes. I was told not to put MY money into her accounts..
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Don't sign anything at the Vet nursing home which would obligate you to pay for their care.
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