We built a 2 bedroom addition on our house for my parents 6 years ago. They are in their mid-nineties and it's not working out on an emotional or physical level for anyone. My mother has Alzheimer's and my father is a grumpy old man. They refuse housecleaning services and are in desperate need.
I still have a child at home and work in my home. If we travel we need to ask the older kids to stay with them. Someone always needs to be in the house when my father naps to watch over my mother. My mother also sleep walks at night. . not good.
Feeling stuck and feeling guilty about feeling stuck.

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Dear janny, I hope you can get past the feeling of guilt. It seems you have done a lot to help your parents. I understand caring for a grumpy parent, and also deal with Alzheimer's. I think the emotions you're experiencing are natural. I struggle with mixed emotions, as well, but have found that this site, an Alzheimer's Support Group, and my wonderfully supportive family and friends keep my emotions from plummeting. When tired, it's especially easy to feel discouraged or down. I don't think we need to be ashamed of our feelings, or about acknowledging them, including the negative ones. Not everyone understands our struggles, but many on this site do. Try tracing them to their root cause, and be as honest with yourself as possible. Seek alternative solutions to your particular situation, and try to make changes where you can.

You are sandwiched in between the generations, and trying to keep a lot of plates spinning at the same time. That can be hard under good circumstances. You're probably doing a wonderful job, so try being gentle with yourself. Give yourself the gift grace and forgiveness for any negative feelings, and know that this is just a phase in your life that will pass. I know how difficult things can seem to be, but usually the valley moments are fleeting things along the path. Remember that love conquers a multitude of feelings. Hope that helped, a little. Thanks for sharing a part of your story. Take care.
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