18 months ago my mother had a stroke which left her somewhat brain-damaged and memory impaired recently my father was diagnosed with alzhimers and apraxia. My mom now has been diagnosed with dementia as well. All after a neuro exam and psych eval (took a good 3 hours each for this eval). Both can see the mental illness in each other but not in them sells their doctors have highly recommended assisted-living for both of them they both live alone in a home together and really hate each other and resent being told by the other what to do or being told by anybody that they can't do something . The doctors gave me letters on both of them that says the POA needs to be activated. The POA is only a medical one! My brother is listed as a joint owner on all bank accounts so we can still write checks to pay their bills and such. My dad struggles with us telling him when appointments will happen as I have to transport for these. My mom doesn't think anything is wrong with her and really fights us on everything. Her memory is awful and her eval she really failed on all fronts.
My question: I know now that dr has stated incompetency for both we can't have them sign a POA for non medical issues. Mom is really resenting me as I am medical POA and again doesn't like that I'm in charge at this point. Do I have to go to court to get guardianship? What should be my next step. All the medical pros involved say neither should be living alone and should be in assisted living or a nursing facility. Which they totally refuse to consider. Can I get a court order for that? Mom is 78 had a stroke, diagnosed with dementia, can barely walk and recently started peeing the bed on a regular basis. Dad is 82 has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and Apraxia and high anxiety disorder. Neither ones memory is great. Moms is worse than dads. What is my next step???? So stressed!!!!