My mother has mild dementia, but it is starting to progress. Her doctor is afraid of her forgetting where she is going and driving is dangerous for her. She is very active and independent, so this will have a very negative affect on her. How can I put a positive spin on this and find alternatives so she does not feel punished or deprived of her active life. She loves to go to the YWCA daily and shopping, etc.

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Before my mother's best friend was diagnosed with Alz, she would sometimes show up at our house all dressed up, thinking she had been invited for lunch, dinner or to pick up mum and take her to an event. She never had an accident, nor got lost, but she had to lose her licence for her safety.

A couple ideas, contact the local taxi firms and see if one will do a payment card. We did this and it was great. A bill would come at the end of the month, no need to handle cash. Another options is a local bus service, here we have Handy Dart. It is for seniors and others who cannot manage either the regular buses or need door to door delivery.

Do any local shops do grocery delivery? I set that up for my former mil years ago. At first she did not want to do it, but now she loves it and loves getting the phone call to take her order and then the delivery the next day. It is a free service for seniors. Volunteers call on Monday to take the orders, do the shopping, then on Tuesday the groceries are delivered. The delivery person brings them in, placing the bags where directed and putting the perishables away. She has had her Rx delivered for even longer.

How do you spin it?

Personal driver.
Personal Shopper.
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I think this is one of the hardest things we all go through. How to manage safety versus independence. My Mom has not driven in 4 years, but still sometimes says she thinks she could.. and she does not have ALZ yet. We drive her everywhere she needs to go, but it is the idea... And to us the idea she would try to drive in the traffic around here is terrifying. We ask where she would want to go,, and she says the grocery store. Our latest quip is we will but her a golf cart! The grocery is about 2 miles away on a county road.. she knows we are kidding
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