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Help please. She called me at work this morning to ask if I was better and in her narcissistic way just kept poking and poking with questions. I finally told her that after living with us for 8 plus years that I thought it was time to look into independent living. Now she’s in a narcissistic rage and has hung up on me three times at work. How should I handle this behavior?

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I so agree with all the other posters. If she's capable of living alone, then make her leave. if she's needs some assistance, then help her find assisted living. You don't have to put up with abuse. Having two narcs sisters, I know being around narcs is a hell. I also know you don't have to tolerate it. Good luck.
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It certainly sounds like a full blown hissy fit. And unfortunately it will probably keep happening. She must be one of those parents who feels living with their adult children is a right and not a privilege. Use this opportunity to take her at her word. Find someplace for her to go. If she’s competent and fairly healthy, maybe a Senior Apartment.
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If you are serious about moving her into IL, this probably wasn’t the right situation to broach the subject. She probably saw it as a threat. You were annoyed and probably tired and so was she.

How should you handle this behavior? For one thing, stop calling her and giving her the opportunity to hang up on you. When you are calmer and in a better mood, bring up the subject. Ask if she thinks she may have had a panic attack and if she would want medication in case it happens again. Then, tell her that you and she are going to check out some Independent Living places. Assure her you aren’t throwing her out and abandoning her, but the time has come for her to be on her own. Why did she move in with you? Health issues? Mental issues? Just was afraid to be alone? Address her concerns, but be firm in your resolve.
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Since she keeps hanging up on you while you're at work, don't take her calls.
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I think you just have to stay strong in your assertion that she needs to leave and just bear the consequences, short term pain for long term gain.
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Soflagrown Sep 6, 2018
Thank you. I need support right now. She’s completely off the chain. I tried telling her we would help her and she said she didn’t want a f_____ thing from us anymore. My wicked stepfather passed away and that’s how she came to live with us
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